Fashionable (and verbose) Friday

Sit down and relax because there’s a lot to cover today. I should’ve posted this earlier in the week because it’s probably old news by now, but it’s taken me a while to get this whole entry written. Anyway, here’s my take on the fashions from the Oscars this year – not that anyone cares about my opinion, but I like to critique fashion anyway.

I was pretty disappointed overall in the clothes. There wasn’t anyone who I thought was absolutely fabulous, stunning, over-the-top fantastic. I didn’t see any major standout pieces of jewelry, either. Sure, there were lots of diamonds, but usually there are a few special, unusual items that are memorable and I didn’t notice any of those.

Having said that, my hands-down favorite dress was Reese Witherspoon’s:

The picture does not do it justice because it looks black, but it's actually a deep violet shading to lavender at the hem. I love it when actresses wear color on the red carpet – black and white are so darn safe and I’m never a fan of the blush or skin-toned dresses (the possible exception being the gold beaded dress that Charlize Theron wore a couple of years ago). Anyway, Reese looks amazing. Divorce agrees with her – a feeling I know a little something about.

I also liked Nicole Kidman’s red dress with the exception of the giant bow in the back.

It reminded me of the kitten from Disney’s “The Aristocats.”

I also wish she’d quit going so pale blonde with her hair. I think it looks better with a little more color in it (especially because she’s so danged pale she practically glows in the dark – would it KILL her to wear a hint of bronzer?) And wow - her feet are HUGE!

Two dresses I really HATED were Gwyneth Paltrow’s:

and Cameron Diaz’s:

In Gwyneth’s case, I don’t think the color is flattering on her. It looks kind of “muddy” to me although I suppose it’s possible it was prettier in person. The top doesn’t seem to fit quite right – it looks like it’s cutting in to her just beneath her shoulders, but heck, at least she wore a bra this time (remember the awful Goth-chick-see-through thing she wore that time? Shudder!).

In Cameron’s case, this dress reminds me of a prom dress I had back in the 80’s that was bright white, stiff taffeta. Yeah, it didn’t look good on me either. I’m also not a big fan of the dark hair on her, but it probably would look better if she’d chosen a different color dress instead of the white. And please, someone, get the spray tan away from her! She looks like an Oompa Loompa.
I’m on the fence about Penelope Cruz’s dress:

It’s another one of those pale, washed-out colors that I despise, but because of her gorgeous skin and hair color, she actually pulls it off pretty well. The bodice fits her to perfection which is always a worry with the strapless gowns. So many actresses seem to not get the fit right and they’re either too loose (resulting in the continual possibility of imminent mammary flashage) or too tight (resulting in the whole “hey, I’m getting a mammogram for free on the red carpet” squashed look). Then there’s the skirt. My first thought was that I hated it. Then, I gave it a second look and thought that it really is pretty amazing as far as construction and she does manage to carry it without being overwhelmed. Overall, I think my initial reaction is perhaps more due to the fact that my own personal style is a little less “over the top” than that dress is so it looks like too much to me. I do have to say, though, that the dress is lucky it’s on Penelope because I think THAT’s what makes it sort of work. Anyone else would just look like they were draped in dead pink swans from the waist down.

Okay, on to more accessible fashion. And my shoe-rating system for guys. Seems like I’m still stuck in the “is this guy even worth wasting my GOOD gym shoes on” phase. I had someone who was initially shaping up to be a “cute pair of flats” guy, but I had to bust him back down to “not worth putting shoes on at all” status. But that may all be behind me as I have come up with the perfect solution. Y’see, I’ve found the ULTIMATE pair of shoes. I am going to marry these shoes, live a long and happy life with them and then be buried in them.

Guys? What guys?

I have my yellow Charles Jordan d'Orsay pumps:

And as soon as I can scrape up enough cash to afford them, I will be a very, very happy woman.

In the meantime, though, I thought I’d feature a couple of really cute pairs of flat shoes like these pink beaded dragonfly thongs:

and these satin flower-print ballet flats

just for those who are worried that I will be permanently crippled from all the high heels or that I will eventually fall and break my neck.

Seriously, though, how CUTE are those pink dragonflies? And they are BEADED, too! You cannot get much better than that.

Lastly, it being Friday and all, it’s time for some book reviews. Since there’s been nothing but crap available lately, I decided to re-read a couple of old favorites by Lois McMaster Bujold.
"Shards of Honor" and "Barrayar" are the two “prequels” to her Miles Vorkosigan saga. And frankly, as much as I love the Miles books, I think I actually prefer these two because of the main character. Cordelia Naismith is absolutely one of the best sci-fi characters ever written. Smart, strong and with incredible emotional depth and personal standards, she makes these books fascinating reads.

Then, I went out and tried a new author/series in the mystery/occult crossover genre. I wish someone would stop me when I get these urges to try new authors – it NEVER works out well. Yasmine Galenorn’s "Ghost of a Chance" is a prime example. This book contained two things guaranteed to make me label a work as crap. 1. A main character who is beyond stupid and 2. A completely obvious villain who appears out of nowhere in the last 1/4th of the book (thereby making it obvious “whodunit”) Hate, hate, hate that. Did I mention hate? Because it’s really not too strong of a word here.

I’ve got two other books that I’m almost at the end of and I promised myself that I am not allowed to write a review until I’ve actually finished a book so, I’ll just have to save those for next Friday.

Have a great weekend, everyone. I’m going to get the hair re-blonded, run some errands and hopefully drop by a bead and gem show on Saturday and then plan to take the kidlet to the beach on Sunday if the weather cooperates and we both manage to stay healthy that long.

Take care!

KJ

The Surreal Life

Or

My day at the DMV

Yeah, I know, complaint stories about the DMV are so incredibly clichéd, but honestly, as long as I have called and made appointments in the past, I’ve never had a problem. Breezed in, 10 minutes, breezed out.

Not this time.

This experience was a SNAFU beyond belief. So sit back, relax, and enjoy my tale of torment and woe.

So, I’m doin’ the whole post-divorce name change thing, right? I started with the Social Security card (and by the way, THEY are a government agency who has their act so totally together it’s amazing – zero problems with them). Once that was done, I was free to move on to the DMV.

I followed the instructions on the DMV website and made an appointment.

I showed up 15 minutes early for the appointment because that’s just how I roll, yo.

This is where it all went to hell. No handbasket involved – it was an express cart.

The local DMV is located in a strip mall. Don’t ask me why – that’s where it’s always been since back when I was 16 and took my driver’s exam for the first time. When I arrived, I immediately got an unpleasant feeling as I realized that most of the strip mall’s buildings and parking lot were either gone, or were in the process of being bulldozed away. The heaviest area of construction seemed to be at the end of the mall where the DMV had been located. The building was still there, but the parking lot in front of it was ripped up and I felt a bit queasy as I thought it looked like they had closed or moved that office and never updated the website.

Still, there seemed to be a lot of cars and people down that way so I decided to park and check it out. After picking my way through rubble and bulldozers and enduring the obscene catcalls of the construction workers (note: I will NEVER in a million years understand why men do this – I cannot believe that there has ever been a woman in the entire history of womenkind who has EVER responded to this. But whatever) I finally realize that yes, one door of the building is open.

Unfortunately, there is a massive line of people straggling out of it.

Still, I’m early, right? I have plenty of time to get up to the appointment desk and get my business taken care of.

Then I get through the front doors and get a look at the horror that is taking place inside. The place is JAMMED with people. There’s ONE long line leading up to a desk and the line is not moving. I look in vain for any signs saying “appts. go here” in the hopes that I, who have an appointment, need not wait in the line of doom. I also look in vain for any signs or actual human workers who can tell me what, if any, forms I need to fill out before I get up to the desk.

No luck. In either category.

So, after heaving a huge sigh of annoyance, I enter the line of doom. I stand there for 15 minutes and the line doesn’t move at all. However, a DMV worker finally appears and starts pulling various people out of line after asking them questions so I think “a-ha! he’s searching out the ‘appt. people’ and giving them preferential treatment. I shall be saved as soon as he gets to me.”

This, gentle reader, was not to be as I quickly realized that the only people he was pulling out of line were female, dressed like sluts and under the age of 18. This, apparently, is far more effective at the DMV than having an appointment.

Finally, in desperation, I ask the people in front of me if they have appointments. This does not work as they do not speak English. Then, I notice a group of about 5 people standing up at the desk where the line of doom eventually terminates. They are not actually IN the line of doom however and yet some action seems to be taking place in their general vicinity.

I get out of the line of doom (a calculated risk) and go over to this group. Hooray, they are all “appt. people.” I am saved!

Apparently, having an appointment does mean you get to be in the shorter line and then you are processed alternately with the people from the line of doom. An improvement, but a very small one.

It is now 15 minutes PAST my appointment time, but I wait patiently and finally it is my turn at the desk.

Whereupon the zombie retard worker looks at me and says “I’ll be right back.” AND THEN HE LEAVES!

I should mention here that what is happening at the desk is that they give you a ticket and send you over to chairs to sit and wait for your turn. So, again, having an appointment buys you very little as it still does not mean you are going to get processed.

But I digress.

Zombie retard guy is gone for 15 minutes. I see him wandering around the rest of the DMV office. He randomly stops to chat with other co-workers. I think he went to the bathroom. He got some coffee.

Finally he returns and I prepare to tell him that, hey, I HAVE AN APPOINTMENT. You cannot make me wait in line with the rest of the unwashed masses. Okay, so I would never really say that, but I am still suffering from “appointment-having superiority complex” at this point so go with me here.

As I open my mouth to explain, he looks right at me and says “Sorry, I can’t give out any more tickets right now. I’ll come back when I can.”

AND THEN HE LEAVES AGAIN!

I do not get a chance to make sure I am in the right line or ask about forms or tell him my appointment-having status.

Now my line of appointment-people and the line of doom people are all just left standing there, slack-jawed in amazement. And then things begin to get ugly. There is muttering and then louder muttering and I’m sure there would’ve been torches and pitchfork if, you know, we’d had them handy.

Finally…30 minutes later!...a zombie retard chick walks up to the desk and she looks right at all of us and then ignores us. She staples some papers. She gets her purse out and puts on some chapstick and then checks herself in the mirror and then she goes and wanders around a bit and then finally comes back and asks “does anyone here have an appointment?”

YES! It’s my moment of triumph and so I (and about a dozen other people) all raise our hands and pretty much scream “I do! I do!”

At which point she looks very annoyed and says to all of us “okay, whoah, back off.” Listen, dorkface, YOU try standing in line for an hour while no one helps you and you are patently ignored when, dammit, you had an appointment!

She then says she can help “registration people only.” So all the people who are there to register title or pay their registration or whatever, get to jump the line. I’m still standing there, first in line, still not being helped.

Finally another DMV zomboid comes over and whispers in her ear and I guess maybe the planets have correctly aligned or something because they are now going to hand out driver’s license tickets.

Which means me.

Yay. Finally.

So the zombie retard chick looks at me and asks me for my paperwork. Whereupon I pull out my current license, my divorce judgment restoring my maiden name, and my new social security card with the name change on it.

And she says to me (in a voice that leaves no doubt that she thinks *I* am the zombie retard) “no, your PAPERWORK.”

Now, remember back when this all started that I looked everywhere for signs or a person to direct me to the correct forms and found nothing except the lines? Which led me to assume that one made one’s way up to the front of the line and was then directed to the correct forms (if any)?

Yeah, not so much.

So I tell her “What forms? I’ve been waiting in this line and there’s no one to answer any questions nor are there any signs directing anyone what to do.” She looks at me as if I’m a particularly dim-witted species of jellyfish and then turns to the room in general and yells out a name (which I didn’t catch) and lo and behold, it’s junior perv guy who was pulling all the young chickies out of line and ignoring the rest of us. He walks up and she asks him “how come this lady doesn’t have any forms?” Ah ha! HE was supposed to be working the lines and directing people, but was too distracted by 16-year-old butt cracks to do his friggin’ job.

Perv guy looks at me and then looks back at the chick behind the counter and (with a totally straight face) says “oh, she must’ve slipped by me.” Now, before I can flying tackle this guy and beat the crap out of him while screaming “SLIPPED BY YOU, MY ASS!” over and over, the chick nods wisely, says “yes, she must’ve slipped by you”, hands me some forms, tells me to fill them out and come back.

Yes, people, I have now waited 2 hours in line and accomplished exactly nothing.

But I have an appointment!

I get the forms filled out, take them back up to her and she gives me a ticket and tells me to go wait in the chair area. Great. I’m still in line, but at least I’m sitting down.

Ten minutes later I get called to a window, processed, photo taken (yay, no more FAT GIRL D/L photo!) and I’m outta there.

Two hours of bureaucratic stupidity for something that took ten minutes to accomplish.

Only at the DMV, folks.

But make sure you have an appointment. It really makes a difference.

KJ

P.S. The new D/L arrived in the mail this week and while my hair looks a bit funky, the picture does not suck at all. I was shocked, but pleased. As far as the state is concerned, Kelly Osborne is no more. I’m back to Morgan now and couldn’t be happier. I even made it to the bank this weekend to get the name on my account changed, new checks ordered and a new ATM card ordered. No more lame Ozzy jokes every time I pull out my card at a store. Woo hoo!

The irony of it all...

Webster’s dictionary defines irony as:

1. the use of words to convey a meaning that is the opposite of its literal meaning: the irony of her reply, “How nice!” when I said I had to work all weekend.

or

2. an outcome of events contrary to what was, or might have been, expected.

I define irony as paying off one’s final divorce-related legal fees…on Valentine’s Day…with a “love” stamp on the envelope.

Quick, someone call Alanis Morissette.

KJ

The Unbearable Boredness of Being

Well, I was going to write a new blog entry, but darned if I can think of a single thing to say. I’m not often at a loss for words, but there is literally NOTHING happening in my life right now. Everything has ground to a halt due to rampant illness – it’s tough to create exciting blog topics when stomach flu hits.

So, let the random babbling commence:

1. I have a new rating system for guys. It’s based on shoes. In other words, which shoes should I wear on the date. Does the guy rate the cute, but casual flats? Could he appreciate the black leather stiletto boots? Is he worthy of the red satin polka-dot heels? Or should I not waste anything other than my old gym shoes on him? So far, on-line dating has provided a lot of “gym shoe guys” and not much else. Of course, I expect hardly anyone to be worthy of the red satin heels – those practically deserve an instant marriage proposal along with a rock the size of Texas!

2. There has been nothing decent to read for MONTHS now. I am going through major withdrawal. The DT’s are going to kick in any minute. Thank goodness that Linnea Sinclair’s “Games of Command” is due out soon. I just have to make it a LEETLE longer.

3. Being poor sucks. I need…er…okay…I want new clothes. I saw the CUTEST denim skirt at the mall last week. I’ve been trying to find one like it for a year now. Finally find one and have no money. Let me reiterate that being poor sucks.

4. Why is Hugh Laurie so damn hot? Did you see his acceptance speech at the Golden Globes? I thought he was hot on “House”, but I’d forgotten that he actually has a British accent, too. And is funny. A devastating combination. And I can’t for the life of me figure out how he can play this character that is so obnoxious and even downright mean and yet still be H-O-T. He would DEFINITELY rate the red satin shoes! From now on, I’m rejecting everyone who isn’t a Hugh Laurie look-alike, with a British accent. Oh, and loads of money (see #3 above about the suckage of poorness).

5. I made it all the way to the top of the gigantic, steep hill by my house this weekend without dying! This has always been my litmus test for fitness. Back before all the weight loss, I couldn’t even make it a quarter of the way. I’d have to stop and turn around and go home. But Saturday I went for a walk and at the last minute, I decided I would see how far up the hill I could get. To my utter amazement and delight, I made it to the top with no problem. Okay, I was panting and my heart was pounding, but not at the “I’m gonna die if I take one more step” level. And besides, that’s what cardio is all about, right? So, after a couple of months of being stymied on the weight loss plan due to the holidays and all the illness, I’m proud to announce that I’ve lost the first 3.5 lbs. of the additional 20 I decided to lose as part of my New Year’s Resolutions. Go, me! On a side note, I’m also pretty proud of the fact that I made it through all the holidays and illness without gaining back any weight. I managed to stay right at my initial goal weight the whole time even though I had several weeks where I couldn’t get to the gym because of “life” stuff. And now that the illness has passed, I’m right back on the program. In fact, the forced “break” may even help me out by tricking my metabolism a bit. I’m also trying some interval training with my cardio – I do 3 minutes at my regular pace and then 1 minute at a much higher intensity and then repeat for the entire workout. It seems to be quite effective so far.

6. I was going to insert something funny that Ryan said here, but being as it involves bathrooms and poop (why doesn’t anyone warn you that from the moment you decided to become a parent, your entire life will revolve around poop for at LEAST the next 5 years…and probably longer if you have a boy?) I decided to spare you. Trust me, it WAS funny, though.

7. Okay, poorness or no poorness, if I make it to the halfway point on this additional 20 lbs. weight loss thing, I’m sooo buying that denim skirt. In a smaller size.

8. Ndebele (herringbone) stitch does not suck as much as I once thought it did. I think I still prefer peyote stitch, but I’m rapidly learning to really enjoy Ndebele, too.

Which brings me to….ta da! New jewelry pics! These are all from my recent magazine article organization project.

Tubular Ndebele (herringbone) - my very first attempt at this stitch. I think it came out pretty well despite some early struggles. I'll tell you what, a free pair of earrings (my choice) to anyone who can spot the mistake in this bracelet:



Flat Ndebele (herringbone) - this project is from the Oct/Nov, 2004 issue of "Beadwork" magazine and has a lovely, ribbon-like drape to it:



Two crystal bracelets - this pattern makes up really easily and is so pretty with all the sparkling crystals. The new violet opal color from Swarovski is to die for and does not show to nearly its best advantage in the photo:





I learned a lot with all of these new projects. Ndebele (herringbone) is more of a pain than peyote, but as I mentioned, does not suck as much as I once thought it did. Fireline is great for crystal work, but geez! does it tangle, tangle, and tangle some more. Drove me crazy.

I can't wait to dig out some more projects to try from the magazine pile. Sure wish I had more time for beading!

Hope everyone had a nice weekend. I will try to have more excitement in my life in the future so I have something to write about.

KJ

Pictures (cont'd)

Ahem. To continue from where I was so rudely interrupted...

The lack of ability to take a decent picture pissed me off so what did I do? Went on a rampage snapping more crappy pictures all over Laguna. I wanted to capture some of the kooky people that hang out down there, but then I was afraid I might freak them out by snapping the pictures so I settled for some beach shots.









Then I time-traveled back to the 60’s.





Believe me when I tell you that Laguna is, um, well, interesting is the best word I can come up with. You can’t beat it for people watching, though.

Last, but never least, some new jewelry pictures.







I’ve been on a bracelet-making crusade for the last couple of weeks. I made several this past weekend since I was essentially bedridden with a rotten cold and needed something to occupy myself while I tried to get better.

And that pretty much brings things up to date.

I know – I’m a party and a half.

KJ

A picture is worth...

...not much when it's a picture taken by me.

So a while ago I decided to take a bunch of pictures in the hopes of spicing up the blog. Not much happening in parrotsville lately – work, eat, sleep, gym, kid stuff, get sick, get well, repeat. Blah.

Then, of course, I did get crazy busy for a while there and couldn’t find a spare minute for the whole download the picture, photoshop it, write cool (ha!) blog entry and upload everything process. So now I have a whole bunch of out-of-date and no longer really relevant pictures.

Which I am going to proceed to use anyway due to the lack of anything else interesting to write about this week (see paragraph one above regarding my monotonous existence). Hey, if you wanted relevance and humor and interest and all that other stuff, you should probably be reading someone else’s blog. Who is not me. Who maybe has a life.

But back to the pictures.

First off, I took this little gem just to PROVE that yes, we did in fact have a couple of weeks of REALLY FREAKIN’ COLD weather here in So Cal. This picture was taken at 7:00 AM after the sun was up so it wasn’t the actual overnight low which I believe did get down to below freezing.



Now, I know to most of you 39 degrees is “break out the shorts and suntan lotion” weather, but here in la-la land, we consider this one of the early signs of the impending apocalypse. I mean it SNOWED in MALIBU for heaven’s sake. That’s just WRONG.

One of the cool things about my job is that my company shuts down early on the Friday afternoons before holiday weekends. I used that “free time” to take a drive down the coast from Newport to Laguna because although it was REALLY FREAKIN’ COLD that day, it was also one of the most gorgeous days we’ve had in a long time. The air was so crystal clear that Catalina Island looked like it was about 10 steps away and even San Clemente Island was actually visible from shore. Of course, my pictures don’t reflect this because I was using my cell phone camera instead of a REAL camera. So, the whole “really clear day with visible islands” effect I was going for is not there. But you can still see Catalina. Sort of. If you squint.



To be continued in the next entry because blogger is stupid about pictures.

KJ

Books, Boys and...Fish?

I'm trying (ahem...I said "trying") to get back to the Friday book reviews. We'll see how it goes. Still not much coming out in the way of good reads, but I took a chance on an anthology of short stories called "Hags, Sirens and other Bad Girls of Fantasy" edited by Denise Little. After being sick off and on (mostly on) for the last couple of weeks, I guess I was in the mood to kick a little ass and take a few names and the title of this book fit right in with that mood. I wish I could say the same for the contents. Mostly composed of tired and not very well written re-treads of Greek myths (with a few other oddments thrown in), these stories were mostly just boring.Also, they mostly had to do with how the "bad girls" come to "bad ends." Somehow, I just don't like to think of that happening. I mean, Hera as a bag lady? Puhleez. I used to really like anthologies - short stories make great bedtime reading because you don't get the "up until 2 AM because I have to finish this novel" syndrome. Haven't read a good one since Marion Zimmer Bradley passed away, though. I miss her "Sword & Sorceress" books and the Darkover anthologies were always well done, too.

From there, I moved on to an established series that's been a pleasure to read with the possible exception of the last installment which wasn't "bad", but it was confusing. Fortunately, S.L. Viehl's latest book, "A Plague of Memory", gets things back on track. Okay, I still think Duncan Reever is a control-freak creep and am not crazy about him as the romantic lead, but Cherijo Grey Veil is a terrific character and there's no lack of action in this book or confusingly twisted plot lines (which was the problem in the last book. If you've been following the series, I definitely recommend this installment.

That's it for the books, folks. I told you pickings were scarce!

On to some pics I've been meaning to post for a while. Over the New Year's weekend, I took the kidlet to ride the train down to San Clemente pier. Although it was winter and a little chilly, the sun was out and it was one of the most gorgeous days I've ever spent at the beach. I took a few shots with my cell phone camera (which explains the crappy quality) to try to capture the scene. Here's the view of the beach as taken from the pier (the tee-tiny dots in the water are surfers):



Then, there was the cute guy on the pier who asked me out. Who knew the SC pier was a great place to meet guys:



Happy weekend, everyone!

KJ

Musings on "The Dresden Files"

Don’t know if any of you made time to watch the premiere of “The Dresden Files” on the Sci-Fi channel this past Sunday night, but I did and I thought I’d share my impressions.

Anyone who reads this blog regularly (if there are any of you – I could be writing into the void for all I know) enough to come across my book reviews knows that I am a huge fan of Jim Butcher’s “Dresden” series. Seriously, even if you’re not that into fantasy or sci-fi, I would still recommend checking these books out. Just like the “Harry Potter” series, they have an appeal that transcends the genre. They offer mystery, humor, thrilling action, great characters and a good mixture of both light and dark moments.

So, given my love of the books, I viewed the news of an impending TV series with a mixture of excitement and trepidation. Would it be fabulous? Would it be a terrible clunker? Or would it be something a la what Skiffy (aka the Sci-Fi channel) has done to “Battlestar Galactica” (i.e. loved by the critics, but loathed by me)?

Sunday night’s episode proved to be somewhere sort of in the middle. Neither as fantastic as I’d hoped nor as awful as I’d feared. After some lurky-loo research on the Jim Butcher website , I have a better idea as to why some of the changes from the books were made and why I had the so-so reaction to the first episode that I did. However, the research also leads me to hope that future episodes will improve

Here’s my boiled-down version as to “what’s up with this show”:

So, first up - the cosmetic changes. Yes, the staff is now a hockey stick. The pentacle amulet is a triangle. The Beetle is a Jeep. Murphy and Susan have switched physical characteristics. The black duster coat is now a jacket. Some of the characters’ names have changed - Karen Murphy is now Connie Murphy, etc.

Y’know what? Don’t really care. Despite the tomes of arguments (pro and con) that have been written on the internet by fans of the series on all this stuff, when it comes right down to it, none of these things are going to make or break the show. Therefore, don’t care. Yeah, I had a pang or two about the Beetle because it works so well in the book, but I can fully accept that it was changed due to certain technical requirements of shooting a TV show (not to mention that the tall actor playing Dresden would’ve looked ridiculous in a VW Bug).

The major character changes are where I have more of an issue. So, okay, apparently there’s some “rule” in Hollywood that “thou shalt not have talking skulls on shelves” and I can accept that they gave Bob an actual body. It probably works better for TV to have more of a visual (and they can spend the tech dollars on other CGI stuff for the show).

HOWEVER, it’s the change in Bob’s CHARACTER that I think is going to be a major make-or-break point. Bob’s a major part of the comic relief in the books – an element that last Sunday’s show was sorely lacking in. Yet, despite his sort of drunken-perverted-frat-boy-exterior-hiding-murky-bad-juju-past he’s very likeable and the exchanges between Bob and Dresden are some of the most enjoyable dialogue in the books. By turning him into the ghost of an old wizard in the show, I feel like the audience is being given a big ol’ cliché. A cliché that, if this first episode was any indication, is whiny and pathetic. I don’t need more whiny and pathetic in my life – I have real people who provide me a full dose of that, thanks so much. Sarcastic, snarky Bob from the books is so much more interesting.

Then, there’s what they’ve done to Harry himself. I can accept that (as per the executive producer’s posts on the website) he’s been written to be a little more grounded in reality than in the books, but so far, they seem to have lost the dichotomies and internal conflicts that make Harry so interesting. Here’s this incredibly powerful wizard who’s always in trouble, barely lives above the poverty level, can’t interact with most modern technology, has wounds from a rough childhood, and is pretty inept with women and other personal relationships.

I found it incredibly jarring that the opening scene of the show was Harry waking up in bed with some random waitress from the local diner. Hello? Harry is not a one-night-stand kind of guy. His old-fashioned “knightly” views are a MAJOR component of who he is. In my opinion, that’s also one of his more likeable characteristics. It often leads to him getting into interesting dilemmas when it clashes with say, his personal safety (i.e. save the damsel but possibly get eaten by the big nasty who’s threatening her or do the smart thing and bail).

Now, the abruptness of this “relationship” could possibly be explained by the fact that it turns out this episode was NOT the pilot. Skiffy, in its infinite un-wisdom, decided to run the episodes out of order. This probably is the reason for my major gripe about the whole show which was that it felt like I was just dropped into the middle of something that made no sense. And, if I felt that way (and I’ve read the books), I can only imagine how someone coming upon the series for the first time would feel.

So, all in all, I can accept the majority of what has been changed. I think it remains to be seen whether the writers can come up with enjoyable, interesting replacements for the personality changes they’ve made in the characters because that is what will ultimately determine whether people get hooked on the show or not.

We’re not going to get the Harry, Bob, etc. of the books. That could be okay if what we get instead proves to be as compelling as the original. It will certainly be something that can only be determined after viewing more than one episode. I just hope Skiffy allows the show that time before making any “plug-pulling” decisions.

While I was underwhelmed by the first episode, I will be tuning in a few more times to see if the writers can convince me to stick around. They’ll certainly have to do better than Sunday’s episode, though.

And now for something completely different.

Jewelry pictures:



I call this one "Fern Grotto" on account of all the green and stuff. I'm on a serious roll with these bracelets. Never let it be said that I exercise moderation when excess is possible.



The colors in this one reminded me of a frosty, starlit sky in winter. Probably all the cold weather we've had lately.

Ta!

KJ

A busy bee...

...gathers no moss. Or maybe it's a rolling stone smashes bees out of its way? Whatever.

Insert all the usual excuses for me being a busy, busy, busy girl (apologies to those who thought I was a bee. I'm not).

I did manage to get some beading done over the three day weekend (chores? what chores?) so here are some pics:



This is another of Jeff Welsh's fabulous boro glass pendants. I never thought I'd be designing necklaces around a shark motif, but he just does such a great job with the shapes - so lifelike - that I couldn't resist. I put together a bunch of strands of seed beads, crystals and pearls to pick up the colors in the pendant and then added Bali silver cones and an "S" clasp. I call this piece "Brenneke Beach" after my most memorable encounter with a shark. It involved an 18' tiger shark who, after perusing the "surfer appetizer" menu at Brenneke Beach on Kauai, decided he'd rather have sea turtle. This turned out to be fortunate for me and the rest of the surfers in the water at the time considering that all of us were blissfully unaware of our uninvited guest until one of the island tour helicopters that was flying overhead spotted the shark swimming around our ankles and dipped down to try to warn us of the potential of impending, toothy doom. Sadly, we thought they were just being friendly and giving the tourists aboard a chance to wave to the surfers. So, all we did was politely wave back. Then the lifeguards hopped on their jetskis and came out to tell us what was really going on. I have no memory of how I actually made it to shore - only that it took me about a nanosecond to get there. Then, we all went up on the cliff overlooking the beach to take a look at the shark, which was still circling in the water. A HUGE, impressive site. 18' is only an estimate from one of the locals - it's quite possible the shark was larger than that.

And yes, tiger sharks are one of the species known to eat people. When there aren't any handy sea turtles...

One of my "chores" for the weekend (I say "chores" in quotes because it's actually fun which is sort of the opposite of a chore) was to cull through my beading magazines and get rid of the backlog. I do this by tearing out any projects I think look interesting and putting them into 3-ring binders for later use. Then, I toss what's left of the magazine. That keeps all my potential projects organized (no wasting time flipping through a zillion magazines saying "I know that project was in that issue with that thing on the front sometime in 2006") plus it cuts down significantly on the storage space requirements.

I got all fired up with great ideas while I was doing this and picked one project to start. Unfortunately, it required 24 6mm crystal bicones in one color to complete it. Now, with a bead stash the size of mine, you'd think that I have EVERY FREAKIN' POSSIBLE BEAD under the sun. You'd especially think I have a large amount of something so basic as a 6mm bicone crystal.

You'd be wrong.

Oh, I have crystals galore. I have 6mm crystals. I even have 6mm bicone crystals.

But do I have 24 6mm bicone crystals in the same color?

No.

Do I have 12 each 6mm crystals in two colors that could even remotely coordinate with each other?

No.

CRAP!

So, now I'm faced with a dilemma. Break my less than 1 month old resolution to limit my beading purchases to only replacement of standard supplies (i.e. thread, jump rings, head pins, etc.) OR give up on this project.

Guess which option I chose?

HAH!

Wrong!

It was a trick question.

I did both.

Turns out my favorite crystal supplier was having a terrific sale so I stocked up on 6mm bicone crystals at quite a discount. Hey, they're basics so I didn't TOTALLY break my resolution.

While waiting for them to arrive in the mail, I moved on to a different project which, miracle of miracles, I turned out to have all the right materials for. Okay, okay so I substituted 8 lb. test Power Pro for the 6 lb. test Fireline, but that's not something that will make a difference. Here are the results:



These turned out to be so easy and so much fun that I've now churned out a bunch of them. I'll be posting more pics later in the week, but here's the second one I did:



I spent the rest of the weekend and most of last week working on a major project at work and preparing to pull off the 4-year-old birthday party of the century (pizza, a Spiderman bouncy house and chocolate cake with chocolate filling) where a good time was had by all and Ryan and I spent an hour and a half jumping in the house by ourselves after the party was over. My neighbors have now had visual proof that I am crazy. I think some of them may have even acquired videotaped evidence of it. It will probably show up on YouTube soon.

Ryan's favorite gift? So far it's the "Bug Vacuum." For those who want to know, it does exactly what the name implies. It has 3 speeds of "suckage" (for small, medium and large bugs I suppose). You place the nozzle over the desired bug and squeeze the trigger and the hapless little fellow is immediately sucked into a canister. You then flip a lever to seal off the canister and remove it from the vacuum. The top of the canister is a magnifying glass so you can now view your sucked bug at SUPER EXTREME CLOSE-UP RANGE. We haven't tried it with a real bug yet, but the vacuum comes with a fake "practice bug" and Ryan has now spent hours vacuuming that thing up all over the house. Now if I could only get him to use the real vacuum on the carpets, it would be great.

By the way, despite the toy's claim that this process will not be harmful to any actual, living bugs, I have my doubts. The fake bug is already looking a little the worse for wear...

Anyway, after all that, I woke up Sunday morning to find that I am coming down with yet another cold. Everyone in my family has been bouncing some virus or other around between us since New Year's. We are like some giant viral pinball machine.

This past Sunday night was the long-awaited premiere of "The Dresden Files" on the Sci-Fi channel. I was so looking forward to this, but have to say that the initial episode was a bit disappointing. I will give it a few more chances in the hopes that it improves. I'm such a fan of the books that I have to wonder if that has colored my judgment of the show. I wonder if someone not acquainted with the novels would have a different take on the TV version...

I can at least say that it is not as bad as what they did to "Battlestar Galactica".

That's it for now. I'll try to post more bracelet pictures later in the week.

KJ

Disappointment Reigns Supreme

Welcome to 2007 in which drastic household budget cuts have forced me to give up my dream of becoming the Shoe Queen of the World. Since I can still (for the time being) afford books, here’s a review of my most recent reading material. Don’t get too excited – good stuff has been notoriously hard to find lately. I find that odd as usually December is a good time for books. Publishers plan all those hot, new releases to coincide with the Christmas gift-buying season. Sadly, that was not the case so I’ve been scraping the bottom of the barrel and even (gasp!) been perusing some “new” authors. That’s always a risk which too often leads to disappointment and the occasional hurling of a piece-of-crap book across the room.

Fortunately, Simon R. Green managed to drop a new “Nightside” novel in early January which provided a lone bright spot.
“Hell to Pay” chronicles the continuing adventures of John Taylor in the Nightside – that seedy underbelly of London that’s not quite of this world. It’s a relief to know that there will be more Nightside books in the wake of the “Lilith War” which all but destroyed that world in the previous book and led to rampant speculation that Green was done with this series.

Still, I was left with mixed feelings about this particular installment. While it was nice to take a break from the relentless action and rather-more-than-necessary violence of the last few books and see Taylor get back to being a detective, I found it a little “obvious” that his gift gets shut down thus forcing him to “detect” via the old-fashioned question-and-answer method. That is not Taylor’s forte – as is proved when he meanders around having conversations with all the “likely suspects” which end up leading him exactly nowhere. I found the identity of the kidnapper to be patently obvious from early on and yet Taylor never actually solves the mystery. The guilty party identifies himself/herself (which has to be one of my biggest pet peeves EVER – why do authors do this? Sheer laziness?) in the threadbare “ha ha I’m so brilliant and evil and you’ll never stop my nefarious plot BWAHAHAHA” speech given by every villain of all time and used by authors to allow the hero of the story the time to thwart said villain’s brilliant plan.

As always, the strength of these books is the endless imagination of Green when it comes to creating unusual characters, powers and situations. However, other than brief appearances by Dead Boy and Larry Oblivion, and a few brushes with minor new characters, this strength is not used to its best effect. Suzie Shooter doesn’t even appear – perhaps Green is saving a furthering of her relationship with Taylor for another book? Dead Boy’s “car” gets more stage time than just about anyone else.

I would probably give this book a more negative review if I hadn’t been so starved for anything even remotely decent to read. I hope future installments take the series back to its better self.


Sadly, the lack of good reading material caused me to fall even further off the path of good taste when, after reading reviews that hinted that this might not be as bad in the sex department as previous books had been, I broke a long-held resolution and picked up "Stroke of Midnight" , Laurell. K. Hamilton’s latest “Meredith Gentry” novel.

I do agree with the reviews – there is SLIGHTLY less obnoxious and graphic sex in this book. There is even an attempt at a plot (solving two mysterious murders). So, overall, this book represents a SLIGHT improvement, BUT, my fundamental issues with the series remain firmly in place. It is so incredibly frustrating to me that Hamilton has created this fantastic world and peopled it with such potentially interesting characters and yet she makes no use out of them. We get these tantalizing hints of their pasts and previous powers, but those never lead anywhere because oops! time for another gratuitous sex scene. And while the sex scenes are overly graphic and “porno” for my personal tastes, it’s not the sex that bothers me so much. It’s the constant interruption of the action and plot line that occurs because these characters can’t take three damn steps down a hallway without having to stop and boink each other. Once again, the guilty party “confesses” (helped out by some extreme torture courtesy of the Queen of Air and Darkness...which leads one to wonder whether the “confession” is worth the blood...er...paper it’s printed on) so what little detective work Meredith manages to fit in between orgasms is pointless.

Then, the book ends so suddenly that I was left wondering “wha’ happen?” After reading the on-line reviews of the next installment in the series, “Mistral’s Kiss”, (now out in hardback), it becomes patently obvious that it was meant to be the last few chapters of “Stroke of Midnight” but either greediness (on the part of the editor/publisher) or laziness (on Hamilton’s part) caused the hatchet job which split this book into two pieces – neither of which can really stand on their own. Urggh. Well, it’s my own fault for breaking my resolution not to buy any more of her crap, but hey, it was out in paperback and I was trying to be fair and hope that she’d learned a little something and made some improvements. I really need to stop giving in to my nobler impulses.


Hmmm...this review is turning into something of a downer. Maybe it’s just me because I ran into another disappointment...this time from one of my very favorite authors, Katherine Kurtz. For those of you not familiar with her, run, don’t walk, and pick up her “Deryni” or “Adept” books. Both are some of my top reads of all time. Plus, the woman lives in and is personally renovating a castle in Ireland. It even comes complete with its own ghosts (according to her http://www.deryni.net website, anyway). How cool is that?

Sadly, she writes with glacial slowness so a new offering from her is a rarity. I was quite thrilled to find out that her latest book came out during this “dead” period when there’s not much else available.
“Childe Morgan” is the sequel to “In the King’s Service” and is a part of the Deryni series. Unfortunately, it’s just not very good. Despite the title of the book, the plot (such as it is) focuses more on Alaric Morgan’s mother, the Lady Alyce de Corwyn Morgan, than on Alaric himself (being that he is only 3 years old). And, there really isn’t much plot to speak of, after all. There’s a lot of knightings and meandering back and forth between various castles. The Camberian Council makes a couple of brief appearances and some major characters make their exits, but all in all, the book reads more like “background” to the Deryni series rather than something that can stand by itself in a novel. Plus, it was awfully short to justify it coming out in hardback. I understand there’s a third installment in this part of the series that is planned for the future and I can only hope that it focuses on Alaric coming of age and the challenges he faces supporting King Brion in the early part of his reign. On the plus side, Kurtz’s knowledge and use of medieval history, heraldry, and religion is spot-on as always and makes the world of Gwynedd come alive. Her magical rituals are also particularly well thought out and well written although they don’t play a major part in this particular book.

Next, I picked up the latest offering from Mary Janice Davidson (author of the Betsy Taylor “Undead” series). And, in a continuing theme,
“Sleeping With The Fishes” was another disappointment from an author whose work I usually enjoy. Fredrika Bimm is just a watered-down version of Betsy Taylor...with fins instead of fangs The male leads (whose names I can’t even remember now...which should tell you something) are silly and one-dimensional. There was less than zero chemistry between either of them and Fredrika so that makes another area in which this book can’t hold a candle to the “Undead” series. The humorous banter and strong friendships that make that series come alive are totally lacking in “Fishes.” I did like the cover art, though (she says in a lame attempt to come up with something positive to say).

Lastly, I have a gripe. Because of the dearth of good reading material right now, I practically mowed down a whole bunch of people to race to the bookstore when I saw that Tanya Huff had come out with another installment to her “Valor” series. Imagine my disgust when I actually picked up the book in the store and realized that it was nothing but a re-issue of the two previous books bound together under one cover. Now, don’t get me wrong, both books are excellent and if you don’t already have them, then I highly recommend adding “Confederation of Valor” to your collection. I just thought there ought to be a “buyer beware” notice somewhere to alert those of us who already have the earlier editions that buying this one would be redundant. At least I realized the problem before I actually paid for it and brought it home.

Well, that’s all I’ve got for now. I’m getting over a cold, but am looking forward to a nice, relaxing, three-day weekend. I’d like to hope that I could get some jewelry made and watch some football, but given the amount of chores around the house that need to be done, that’s looking rather doubtful. I also have to do all the preparation for the kidlet’s 4th birthday party next weekend. My baby is turning 4! Happy Birthday, Ry Ry!

Take care, everyone, and if I don’t get to post again, have a good weekend!

KJ

KJ's Corollary

Reading some of the comments on the blog (thanks, Jenie) reminded me that I had this whole entry about shoes written that I never posted. It has nothing to do with anything, but really, can one ever spend too much time shoe shopping?

Yeah, I didn’t think so.

So, way back when I began this whole diet odyssey, I thought about setting rewards up for myself along the way. Every 10 lbs. earned me new make-up or a new item of clothing. At the halfway point, I treated myself to these fabulous Guess satin wedges

As a “final reward” if I actually made it to my initial goal weight, I planned to really splurge on something truly outstanding. Since Manolo Blahnik’s and Christian Louboutin’s are outside my price range, I made trip to Zappos.com where I found these to-die-for Vince Camuto spectator platform pumps (of which there would be a picture here except Blogger is being STUPID). I’ll have to add the pic in later.

The only problem with that plan was that by the time I finally hit my goal weight this past weekend, these babies were no longer available. Ahhh…the crushing disappointment.

However, a good sorority girl driven by major shoe lust cannot be kept down for long. An afternoon trip to the Macy’s at Fashion Island in Newport Beach brought new and lust-worthy opportunities to my attention.

First, I picked up this updated version of the classic peep-toe pump.

These shoes have quite a platform, 3.5” heels and are midnight blue suede, but when paired with my classic gray tweed cuffed trousers, they are still appropriate for work. The best part is that the platform makes these shoes surprisingly stable and therefore, they are actually comfortable. I mean, I wouldn’t want to run a marathon in them or anything, but I’ve worn them for an eight-hour work day and they were fine.

Then, because a girl can never have too many frivolous, but hot, shoes, I also picked up this pair of red satin polka-dot sandals.

They’ll look amazing peeping out from under jeans on a date or spicing up my very prim and proper cream tulip skirt. And if I pair them with my so-sexy LBD, well, stand back is all I can say.

That takes care of the weight loss rewards for now although I’ve decided to lose another 20 lbs. – the first two of which are already gone! I’ll need a reward if I reach that goal and I’m thinking these green and gold animal print pumps by Carlos Santana will be the perfect answer.

And yeah, I know, it’ll be hard to come up with something that they match with, but who cares? These shoes are H-O-T. Who knew a guitar player could design such amazing shoes?

Plus, I figure I deserve a li’l something for signing the final divorce paperwork and who better to turn to for the solution that JLo herself. After all, the woman knows a thing or two about ending relationships!

Yes, I think purple suede with an ankle strap and bow pretty much sends the desired message that anyone who would voluntarily give up a woman who wears these shoes and looks this good in them is an effing moron.

Y’know, when I was little, my mother used to always remind me of Thumper’s Rule: “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” But I prefer KJ’s corollary: “shut up and let your shoes do the talking.”

And you thought the title of this post didn't make any sense. Ha!

KJ

Resolved...

I don’t usually go in for the whole “New Year’s Resolution” thing. In fact, don’t think I’ve ever made one and have always thought them to be kind of silly. I mean, really, don’t most people kinda know deep down what they need to be working on in their lives? Y’know, we might be in denial about them or not be willing to tackle them head one, but in those fleeting, dark, still moments where we’re REALLY honest with ourselves, I think most of us at least know the general areas that we have issues with.

Besides, does ANYONE EVER actually stick with a resolution until it’s been achieved? I sorta doubt it. But then, I’m cynical that way.

Still, in the last two years, I’ve made a conscious choice to go out and pursue things that are not my natural inclinations and so far, it’s worked pretty well. So, maybe I ought to give this resolution thingy a try?

Here goes (in no particular order):

1. Spend more time with the kidlet. Being a single, working mom puts a severe restriction on how much time I actually get to spend with him that isn’t taken up with getting him dressed, fed, cleaned, put to bed, etc. I want more time where we enjoy each other’s company, play, learn, and make memories.

2. Lose another 20 lbs. Even though I met my weight loss goal back in October and have kept the weight off, I feel like I can go further in this area.

3. Expand my social horizons – both romantically and platonically. I took a couple of stabs at this in 2006, but I need to focus more attention on it in 2007 and explore more options.

4. Clean up, re-organize and re-decorate the house. Now that I no longer have the burden of having to work around someone else’s stupid ideas…er…I mean now that the divorce is final, I finally have the freedom to tackle this long overdue project. And, I can do it without losing my motivation because someone else is standing around bitching and moaning, complaining, making 70,000 trips to Home Depot because he can’t remember sh*t, just generally being a pain in the ass, and getting angry and yelling at me because he doesn’t know what the heck he’s doing and has messed stuff up but can’t admit it and therefore has to take it out on me because I dared to suggest that perhaps drinking a 6-pack while working on a project might hamper one’s ability to perform household repair tasks. Yeah, I’m so gonna miss that. NOT!

5. Add more outdoor activities to my workout schedule. I’m finding the gym is getting a bit boring so I’ve hit a couple of bike stores to price bicycles and want to start taking walks at the beach on the weekends. Hey, how else am I gonna meet a cute surfer?

6. Be thankful every day for my family, my health and my FREEDOM. Enjoy the peace in my house, make good use of the solitude, feel how much easier it is to stand up straight without the 10-ton burden on my back of being forced to live by someone else’s rules. Revel in the fact that the house is now a criticism-free zone. Well, except when Mom comes to visit, but that’s a whole ‘nother issue.

I think there are supposed to be 10 of these resolution things, but since I’m a newbie at this and since I’ve picked some pretty big stuff to tackle, I think I’ll leave it at six. I’ll have to do a “check-in” in July or something to see how I’m progressing on these things.

I’m off to see “Dreamgirls” with a friend tonight and then dinner at The Cheesecake Factory. Hey, it’s not 2007 yet so I don’t have to start working on those 20 lbs. until Monday! I’m also trying to plan some activities for the kidlet for this weekend, too. We’re either going to Legoland or we’re going to take the train to San Clemente on Saturday and walk on the beach and maybe eat at the pier.

Happy New Year, everyone!

KJ

Christmas Spirit on sale at Target!

I did a lot of reflecting about the “Christmas Spirit” last weekend. It’s not something I ever really had to think about before – I was always brimming over with it. The original Christmas Elf, that’s me. No matter how much others (aka the X) bitched and groused and made general Scrooges of themselves, I refused to be daunted. Halls would be decked, carols would be sung and there would be drinking of wassail and much general merry-making.

Even last year with the horrific events of September and October dragging at me, I was determined to enjoy the holidays. I had a momentary blip on Christmas Eve when the kidlet arrived home to announce in front of my entire family that he’d spent the evening with his dad and his dad’s mistress. The kidlet didn’t use those words, but it was obvious what was going on and since that was the first I knew for sure (although I’d suspected) that there was another woman (oh, who am I kidding…women), well, what a nice Christmas present for me. But, I buried it and soldiered on, more determined than ever to not let the holidays be ruined and I did a pretty good job of it. Support from my family and some extra-nice presents didn’t hurt.

But this year, with the divorce being finalized in the last couple of weeks, I suddenly found myself totally lacking in any Christmas Spirit whatsoever. I didn’t care about shopping. I didn’t have any reason to bake anything. I made a half-hearted attempt to put some Christmas lights on the house but only because in my neighborhood you HAVE to participate in the whole lights thing or the neighborhood mafia makes sure you quietly disappear…or so I’ve heard. I kept wondering what was wrong with me and thinking “well, things will change when I get closer to the holidays.”

Then, I tried putting on some Christmas music to put myself in the mood and found myself crying and that’s when I knew. The universe had finally won. The Christmas Spirit had finally been trampled, kicked, beaten and pounded out of me. It was just gone and I couldn’t figure out how to get it back.

I cried more about that realization than I have about anything in a long time. Something about the knowledge that I’d finally lost that last childlike spark of innocence was incredibly disheartening. I tried to put on a front. I went Christmas shopping. I bought cookie decorating paraphernalia and a gingerbread house kit for the kidlet. I even volunteered to host Christmas Day at my house because hey, no stress. I no longer cared.

Then, something started to happen. I went over to my parents’ house to wrap my presents and help them wrap theirs. On the way, I stopped at Target to pick up some extra boxes and other wapping supplies. While I was there I realized I should check out some Christmas decorations for the inside of the house to make things a little more festive since I was hosting the day. I found a small fake tree that came complete with lights (no assembly – yay!) on sale for $20 and got that. Then I realized I needed extra stocking hangers for all the guests coming and I found a really cute little table runner to put on my buffet table. I knew I was going to put my evergreen garland across the mantle, but bought a string of lights and some gold bows to spiff it up a bit. Then I remembered all the holiday candles that I never use because I don’t have bases for them so I picked up some different candle-holders and bases and a bag of cinnamon apple potpourri. Despite it being the last weekend before Christmas, I breezed through the checkout line and by the time I hit my car, I was feeling decidedly pepped up.

Then, I hit the bird store to pick up some extra treats for the parrot and some things for Santa to leave in his stocking. Yes, the parrot has his own Christmas stocking. Want to make something of it? YOU try explaining to a 3 year old why everyone except the bird got something from Santa! Of course, while I was there, I had to stop and play with all the baby birds including one incredibly sweet baby cockatiel who’d had an accident and lost most of its upper beak. Despite that, it begged for me to pick it up and let me scratch its head and then it rode around on my shoulder while I did my shopping. It was awfully hard for me to leave that bird behind – it reminded me so much of my sweet Jimmy-girl who passed away a year ago this Thanksgiving. Still, I felt really good by the time I left the store. I guess there’s just something about unconditional love – it’s obviously an essential ingredient in “Christmas Spirit.”

And while I started out irritated at having to spend a day doing nothing but wrapping, I found myself starting to really enjoy playing with the pretty paper and ribbon. I thought about all the previous Christmases where I’d helped my mom with the wrapping starting when I was about 12 or so and she first taught me how to wrap a package. Mom sat down at the table with me and wrapped a few things and we talked…which we hardly ever do unless it’s about babysitting or groceries or things I need my dad to help me with around the house. It was nice.

I spent the next morning putting up my new little tree and decorating the mantel with all the fun things I’d bought and for once, I was really pleased with how things turned out. Usually when I plan a project like this, one string of lights burns out or I can’t find what I want at the store or something gets dropped and broken, but none of that happened and everything looked even better than I had planned.

I even had enough time left over that I decided to replace the hand-painted Christmas shirts that I made for the kidlet and me to wear the last couple of years. Both of us had completely outgrown them – his were too small and mine was WAY too big. A quick trip to Michael’s for some shirts and then home to dig out my fabric paints and my patterns and I got three shirts done. Plus, I mostly finished the charm bracelet I’m making for the kidlet’s teacher’s present.

I looked up from painting the last shirt and suddenly realized that my Christmas Spirit was back in full force. I couldn’t wait for the kidlet to get home and see how I’d transformed the house and help me finish decorating the tree. I ordered some classic Christmas movies for us to watch this weekend and picked up some cocoa and marshmallows to have tonight after we finish the tree. The Christmas music is all queued up in the CD player and I’ve even got candles and the fireplace going.

I started crying again, but this time they were tears of joy because I realized that my Christmas Spirit was never lost at all. I just had to remember how to get to the special place where I keep it. Y'know, Target really DOES have EVERYTHING! And sometimes it's even on sale...

Not sure how much posting I’ll do over the holidays…I’m on full-time Mom (not to mention Elf) duty until about January 10th, but a very Merry, Merry Christmas to all and I’ll see you in 2007!

KJ

P.S. Here's the picture of the teacher's bracelet all finished. It was supposed to have more charms on it, but that shipment never arrived from the vendor so I had to improvise:

Book Review

Whew! Haven’t had time for a book review in a while so thought I’d sneak in a small one. Part of the problem has been lack of decent reading material. Most of my favorite authors have new material coming out in the first or second quarter of ’07, but the last few months have been abysmally bereft of anything really awe-inspiring.

I read Wen Spencer’s “Wolf Who Rules” – the follow-up to “Tinker” – and found it to be pretty good. The plot got a little out of hand towards the end, but generally, it was a good sequel. I think I’d wait for the paperback version, though, as it doesn’t quite live up to the start made in the first book. Having said that, I somehow managed to buy two copies of the hardback version without realizing it (hello? blonde hair!) so if anyone wants the second one, e-mail me and we’ll work out a deal.

I’ve also been continuing to read the “Honor Harrington” series by David Weber. I’m on about book #8 or something and while they’ve been keeping me busy, there’s really no need to do individual reviews on them as basically the same thing happens in every book. The Star Kingdom of Manticore gets its fanny caught in a bear trap and Honor Harrington single-handedly (and against overwhelming odds) rescues it while simultaneously proving that she is “practically perfect in every way.” Weber does try very hard to balance that out with a lot of tough command decisions and personal injuries/losses that she has to deal with, and that helps keep her from being super-annoying in the perfection department. Still, it’s one of the things that you just sort of have to accept and overlook about the character and the series as a whole. There’s a little too much time and attention paid to starship technology, the physics of battles in space and the enemy’s internal political struggles for my personal taste, but those things are the hallmark of this particular genre so if they bug you, just skip over ‘em to get back to the action. That’s what I do and it works just fine. I do have to say that, annoying technological interruptions aside, other authors could learn a thing or two about action and intensely-paced battles from Mr. Weber. If you find yourself approaching one of the climactic battle scenes in these books at bedtime – either put the book down and wait for morning, or prepare yourself for a sleepless night as you try to recover from a major adrenaline rush.

Lastly, I picked up the first book in Lois McMaster Bujold’s newest series. “Beguilement: The Sharing Knife Volume 1” is an interesting departure from both her Vorkosigan series and her Chalion series. Although it’s fantasy like Chalion, it’s set in a completely different world and deals with “peasant-class” characters versus the nobles who are the main focus of the Chalion series. That’s a refreshing change as it’s a level of society that is too often made one dimensional or ignored entirely by most fantasy novels. The background world and the main “evil” are interesting and well-thought out, but Bujold’s true talent is in making characters come alive. Dag and Fawn are both immediately likeable and interesting and the romance that develops between them is one of the most well-written I’ve read in a long time although it is somewhat reminiscent of the one she created in “Shards of Honor” – the first Vorkosigan novel. And, let me just say, certain authors (cough! Laurell K. Hamilton cough! cough!) could learn a LOT from the way Ms. Bujold writes a sex scene. It’s absolutely clear what actions are going on and yet it’s written with a sweet innocence that makes it a delight to read. There’s also just enough detail to make it sexy mixed with just enough vagueness to allow the reader’s imagination to go as far as it wants to. This makes a nice contrast to all of the overly-anatomically-graphic sex scenes that seem to be all the rage right now. I’m tired of sex scenes which, rather than being romantic or even nicely lusty, leave the reader feeling as if she needs a long shower after surviving an overly-in-depth gynecological exam.

If I had one small complaint about the book it’s that all the “action” seems to happen in the first third of the book and the last two thirds seem to be more about set up for the rest of the series. That being said, one might want to wait for further books to come out before starting the series so as to be able to read the whole thing at once. Or not. I, obviously, was not able to wait. Oh, and as much as I enjoyed this book, I’d still rather have another Miles Vorkosigan novel, but now that he’s married off and has kids, she seems to be done with him. Which has me totally bummed.

In other news, the premiere of “The Dresden Files” – Sci Fi Channel’s take on Jim Butcher’s “Harry Dresden” - series” is scheduled for a January 21, 2007 air date. While I find it hard to believe that anything could possibly live up to how fantastic the books are, I’m still excited to check it out. Hope springs eternal – despite what the bast…er…people at this channel did to “Battlestar Galactica.” Blech! All I can say is if they do the same thing to my beloved Harry, there will not be a hole deep enough for them to hide in. And yeah, I know, BSG is a big critical success and blah, blah, blah. I don’t care. They turned my Starbuck into a CHICK! That is just so frackin’ wrong! Also, if Starbuck were really a chick…he (she?) wouldn’t be so butch and grim and tormented and complicated. Starbuck is very simple: hot, great pilot, sarcastic-playboy-devil-may-care attitude layered over a genuinely heroic core that he tries hard to make sure nobody notices.

Dirk Benedict , where are you when we need you?

KJ

P.S. Apollo is a wuss.

No time to write much...

So here are some pictures:



and



Everything's up for sale on the site and I've made some other updates there as well. For anyone who placed an order this past week - they're all packaged and ready to go in the mail on Monday, 12/11.

I had hoped to get them out on Saturday, but I got sucked into the giant vortex that is the mall at Christmastime. Left the house at 9:30 AM yesterday. Got home at 8:30 PM...with a migraine and a small, comatose child in tow.

Like I said - packages will mail out tomorrow.

Hope everyone had a great weekend!

KJ

More new items

Ahh...nothing fuels my creativity like the knowledge that USC is out of the national championships and it was my Bruins who told 'em "buh-bye and don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out."

Accordingly, I've got some new pieces to share:



This sweet little dolphin pendant is made out of borosilicate glass that was handcrafted by lampwork artist Jeff Welsh. I've added five strands of coordinating beads and finished off the ends with sterling silver cones and a box clasp set with smoky quartz.



Next is a pair of earrings using hand-painted porcelain beads by artist Kevin Chen. The deep jewel tones on these beads and their incredible surface shine do not come through very well in the scan, but they are stunningly gorgeous in real life.

I did another pair because I like them so much:



The colors in this pair are perfect for the holidays - red, green, black and metallic gold. I added red Swarovski crystals for some extra flash.

All of these items (and more) are up for sale at Silver Parrot Designs

In other news, I finally heard something from AG. Seems he was not blowing me off after all, but just got super busy with work. Hmmm...I dunno. He's definitely moved himself into the "caution" pile if not all the way out the door as far as I'm concerned. I don't have time to play these silly "he's just not that into you" games. I'm still mulling over my response to him so I guess we'll see.

I'm off to an Advent party at church tonight with the kidlet. Free food, carols and crafts so should be fun.

Hope everyone had a great weekend! Is your shopping done yet?

KJ

USC can SUCK IT!

THE BRUINS WIN!

That pretty much says it all.

D-Day

So this is it. D-day. Also known as “the day I sign the final divorce papers.” Good-bye, Kelly Osborne. Welcome back, Kelly Morgan (and don’t even get me started on what a pain in the ass it’s going to be to change my SSN, driver’s license, checking accounts, business cards and umpty-zillion other things back to my maiden name…and yet, still worth it to sever that last tie!)

I find myself strangely calm about it this morning. Okay, so last night I was bawling my eyes out at the gas station while filling up the tank on my car – thus causing the poor lady in the car across from me to give me the “are you okay” look and hand signal and to report about me to the person she was jabbering with on her cell phone. I don’t mourn th loss of him (good riddance to bad rubbish!) but I do mourn the breaking of the vows that I took so seriously and the destruction of something that was supposed to last a lifetime.

And yeah, okay, so last night my dreams were kind of on the nightmare side – something about worms with pincer jaws stuck to my skin and no matter how many of them I knocked off, more kept appearing til I realized they were coming from UNDER my skin. Sometimes it’s just a party to be me I tell ya! On the other hand, I save myself a FORTUNE in illegal hallucinogen costs because hey, I can have a bad trip any time I want courtesy of my own twisted imagination. Lovely.

But this morning, I’m calm. Or numb? Anyway, the most burning question in my head when I woke up (having finally gotten back to sleep after the fun of the worm dream) was “what does one wear to the dissolution of one’s marriage?” Sweats and a scrunchie for the “poor, pathetic me” look? Stripper heels and a party hat for that “ding dong the asshat is dead” vibe?

Decisions, decisions.

Initially, I was going to wear my new red sweater and go for that “Nancy Reagan I’m powerful and don’t mess with me” impression, but then I realized that I might end up having bad associations with whatever I wear today and I didn’t want to waste my new red sweater that way. I figured better to go with something that I love so much (and look so good in) that it will always overpower any potential bad memories. So, I chose my black pencil skirt, black and tan cheetah print sweater and knee-high black stiletto boots. The ensemble projects my chosen message of “beautiful but deadly” quite nicely.

Oh, and for that touch of power red? Let’s just say it’s present, but hidden. Thanks, Victoria’s Secret.

So, bring it on. Today is the last day of an old life. Tomorrow, I start a new one and I intend to do it with strength, grace, style…and sexy underwear.

KJ

Site Update!

Whew! I finally got time to sit down and update the website so the newest pieces pictured in the last post are up for sale. Be sure to visit Silver Parrot Designs and do some Christmas shopping!

Now, I'm off to create more stuff. It is AWESOME having some time to make jewelry again!

KJ

P.S. I didn't get my pecan pie, darn it! We went to the buffet at the Marriott Dana Point Resort and while it was fabulous in all other ways (the roasted pumpkin bisque soup was to DIE for...and I don't even like pumpkin!) they didn't have pecan pie! Barbarians. That's all I can say. Absolute and total barbarians!

Who ate the last piece of pecan pie?

It's Thanksgiving and I just had to say that diet or no diet, I am eating pecan pie on Thursday so I recommend standing back. Don't get between me and my pie, people!

And now, this...

Look, actual jewelry on a jewelry blog. Who woulda thunk it? I’m sure everyone is sick of my male-bashing, emotional catharsis, lame song lyrics and obsession with fashion and make-up. So, instead, I bring you seasonally inappropriate jewelry such as my new “Butterfly Garden” bracelet.



I don’t know why I’m working in spring colors in November, but sometimes you just gotta go where the spirit moves you. I got out my entire lampwork collection on Saturday and decided to peruse it for inspiration. That took a lot longer than I had originally planned. I should maybe cut back on the bead-buying for a while.

Yeah. Right.

Anyway, this sweet little set in white, lavender, blue and green just jumped out at me. I THINK they were made by Alisha White, but I could be wrong. Normally, I put a little tag with the artist’s name in with the beads when I store them, but the tag for this set has gone missing so I’ll have to use my best guess. The accent beads are white and lavender freshwater pearls, amethyst Swarovski bicone crystals, spring green Swarvoski cube crystals, ice blue Czech fire-polished rondelles, moonstone rounds, faceted blue lace agate rondelles and Bali silver. The clasp is a sterling silver butterfly toggle that I bought at the L.A. Gift show last year.

I still haven’t managed to make it outside with the digital camera to photograph the lavender embroidered bracelet, but here are a couple of pictures of my latest embroidery bracelet project:



And a close-up:



For this piece, I decided to try incorporating other beads besides just seed beads. I’ve used some royal blue freshwater pearls, Czech fire-polished rondelles, and Japanese Miyuki drops and bugle beads.

Lastly, I made a couple of pairs of earrings with sterling silver filigree tops:





One pair uses Swarovski crystals and Japanese Miyuki drop beads (which are clear and thus hard to see in the picture). The other pair has faceted blueberry “quartz” briolettes along with some seed bead and crystal drops. I’m not crazy about this design and may re-do it. I think the seed beads are just too casual for the rest of the earring. Perhaps I’ll replace them with some loops of chain or maybe some crystals.

That’s pretty much it for now. I’m hoping to get some more work done on projects over Thanksgiving weekend. Kidlet will be with the X so I’ll have a lot of free time other than dinner on Thanksgiving with my folks at the Dana Point Cliffs Resort. I’ve always heard about their Thanksgiving buffet so I’m looking forward to trying it. Architect Guy is apparently “gone with the wind” so it’s back to the drawing board on the whole dating thing.

Sigh.

Men suck.

But, you know, Happy Thanksgiving and all!

KJ

Red Shoe Diaries

Today is a red shoe day. There’s nothing like a great pair of red shoes to make a gal feel like she can go out and conquer the world and perform any ass-kickings that may need to be administered along the way. Don’t believe me? Just ask Dorothy. Of course, I can’t rock the sequins the way she did, but I like to think that my “kicking” shoes of choice (see pic below) have a sleek, modern feel. Because that’s how I roll, yo.

And now for the list of “kickees”:

1. The bozos who on two separate occasions this week revealed their total lack of elevator etiquette by failing to let me and the other passengers OFF the elevator before barging right on and essentially mowing me down in the process. I swear the elevator door opened and some guy was about an eyelash length away from me…TWICE! Raised by wolves, much?

2. The brain trust who decided that rush hour in the rain on a Monday morning would be a good time to turn off the main traffic light that controls the intersection to my office building’s parking lot. Smooth move, ex-lax.

3. The person who invented the words “Storm Watch.” Yeah, right. Drizzle Watch 2006 is more like it. Thanks awfully, though. Because, you know, ooooo…the drama!

4. The quite bizarre saleswoman at Macy’s who felt the need to issue elaborate commentary on each and every one of my purchases…which, considering I was in the lingerie department at the time was disconcerting to say the least. I already KNOW the underwear is cute, thanks. That’s why I’m buying it. Except I had the weird feeling that if she thought what I was buy was ugly, she would’ve commented on that, too, in the same upbeat, chipper, overly-friendly, robotic Stepford Wife-ish voice. Just shut up and bag the damn stuff. If I’d wanted your input, I would’ve asked. I’ve experienced this phenomenon before in relation to food purchases at the grocery store and it’s annoying there, too. But it never had the “creep” and “ick” factor that this gal provided with her running underwear diatribe. Not to mention her brain seemed to not be able to handle simultaneous activities such as talking and ringing up sales so the whole process took, like, a decade or something.

And now, for some red-shoe-ass-kicking music, I bring you the immortal words of Kelly Clarkson (or whoever writes her songs):

Since U Been Gone

Here's the thing we started out friends
It was cool but it was all pretend
Yeah yeah
Since U Been Gone

You’re dedicated you took the time
Wasn't long till I called you mine
Yeah Yeah
Since U Been Gone

And all you'd ever hear me say
Is how I pictured me with you
That's all you'd ever hear me say

But Since U Been Gone
I can breathe for the first time
I'm so moving on
Yeah, yeah
Thanks to you
Now I get
What I want
Since U Been Gone

How can I put it? You put me on
I even fell for that stupid love song
Yeah, yeah
Since U Been Gone

How come I'd never hear you say
I just wanna be with you
I guess you never felt that way

But Since U Been Gone
I can breathe for the first time
I'm so moving on
Yeah, yeah
Thanks to you
Now I get (I get) what I want
Since U Been Gone

You had your chance you blew it
Out of sight, out of mind
Shut your mouth I just can't take it
Again and again and again and again

Since U Been Gone
I can breathe for the first time
I'm so moving on
Yeah, yeah
Thanks to you (thanks to you)
Now I get, I get what I want
I can breathe for the first time
I'm so moving on
Yeah, yeah
Thanks to you (thanks to you)
Now I get (I get)
You should know (you should know)
That I get, I get what I want
Since U Been Gone
Since U Been Gone
Since U Been Gone

So, just a warning to everyone out there…my red shoes and I are in the house. You better straighten up and fly right!

KJ

P.S. Architect Guy (who I’ll be calling AG for short now) paid me the nicest compliment about my lips. This is extra cool because I’ve never liked my lips. In order to avoid drawing attention to them, I never wear anything on them other than lip balm (Bonne Belle Lipsmackers in Strawberry or Vanilla since 7th grade if you must know). Until very recently, that is. I made a conscious decision earlier this year to just embrace myself – real and imagined flaws and all – and went nuts buying lip gloss and wear it all the time now. I guess it paid off. If he says something nice about my nose, next, I may be in love LOL!

Word!

So, the Britster finally kicked K-Fed’s lazy, disgusting, white trash, manpri-clad ass to the curb. I don’t think anyone is remotely surprised (except maybe K-Fed) as it was more a question of “when” than “if.”

What I do want to know and am dying to find out (help me, “People” magazine!) is what is it exactly that finally pushed her over the edge? What made her wake up and smell the chili cheese fries? I can ask that as someone who should’ve pushed the auto-destruct button on her own “K-Fed” years ago. Was it the cheating? The partying? The poor hygiene…oh wait, that was her. Never mind. Maybe it was the the irresponsibility, stupidity and lack of any discernable skills or talent? Did he light up in front of the kids once too often? She finally couldn’t stomach the manpri and wifebeater couture any more? What? You KNOW you want to know, too!

Here’s my theory. She started to lose some of the baby weight, saw herself in the mirror and realized “oh YEAH! I used to be hot. I could have any guy I want. Wait a second…I could have any guy I want and I picked THIS EFFIN’ LOSER?!” Then it took her about a nanosecond to speed dial her lawyer.

My second choice is the manpris...because, DUDE! Manpris?

And now that rat bastard has filed for sole custody? I don’t THEENK so. Not in California. To get sole custody you pretty much have to prove the other party is an axe-carrying serial killer and even then they might get supervised visitation. It’s obviously a pressure ploy to extort money out of her and get around the prenup. Lame. And while I don’t really think much of her, he seems like a far worse choice as a parent. I mean, he’s already got kids from a previous relationship that he ignores.

Why am I spending so much time on this silly stuff you ask? Because my life is so danged exciting, that’s why! Although, I did get an e-mail yesterday from architect guy which was nice. I sent him a reply and cranked up the flirt factor a few notches so we’ll see what happens.

Oh wait, I do have one exciting thing to report. I am ONE POUND away from my initial weight loss goal, people! That’s right…ONE POUND! Of course, I hope to keep on and lose more weight (another 20 lbs.) after that, but even if I’m just able to stabilize right here and keep off the 64 (soon to be 65!) lbs. that I’ve lost thus far it will be a HUGE victory.

So, I was going to skip the gym tonight, but now I’m pretty motivated to go. It’s hard not to when I can practically TASTE victory!