Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Am I Crazy Or....

I swear, the weirdest crap happens to me.

No, really.

I mean, everyone has had car problems. The dead battery. The flat tire. Y'know, the typical stuff.

Not me.

No. I get weird-ass car problems that make me think I've lost my mind.

Like today. Kid and I get in the car this morning and it starts up just fine as usual. So, off we head to his school so I can drop him off to his YMCA program and head to work. All goes well until I try to start the car after dropping him off.

The key will not go into the ignition keyhole.

Yeah, the key that I JUST USED 5 MINUTES AGO to start the damn car. WILL NOT FIT the ignition keyhole any more.

The hell?

I actually stopped to ask myself:

1. Is this my car? Like I accidentally misplaced a fire engine red SUV in an empty parking lot for 5 minutes AND I was able to electronically unlock someone else's car.

2. Is this the right car key? Hmm...well...lemmee check. Because there's only one car key on my keyring and I only OWN the one car and I JUST USED THIS KEY 5 minutes ago with NO PROBLEM. So, yeah, I'm pretty damn sure it's the right key.

3. Can I force it in (because, y'know, late for work now)? Ummm...no.

4. What if I try harder? Yeah, still no.

Then, I actually got out of the car. Locked it. Unlocked it and tried once again to insert the key into the ignition.

Nope. Not happening.

Then I got to call AAA and try to explain this to them.

After the AAA lady stopped laughing, she asked me if I was sure the car was in Park.

Ummmm...yeaaaaaaaaaaaah. On account of it's being STOPPED and all.

So, she promptly dispatched a repair truck. The repair truck was driven by George (pronounced Hor-hey). Horhey was a nice guy and he tried REALLY hard to fix that keyhole - using the latest technology (which consisted of an unbent paperclip and some WD-40).

Ultimately, however, Horhey was defeated. So he called me a tow truck.

The tow truck arrived and it was driven by Francisco (pronounced Pancho). Pancho took one look at my car and informed me that he couldn't tow it because it was All Wheel Drive and he was gonna have to order a flatbed for it.

Which was gonna take at least an hour.

"Really? An hour?" I said.

And okay, there may've been whining at that point because I was thinking about all the work time I've missed over the last few weeks between my back going out and having the Black Death and all.

At which point Pancho goes "well, lemmee try something."

Apparently, Pancho is VERY susceptible to whining because next thing I knew, he had my car up on some kind of wheeled cart in the back so that my back wheels were off the ground and resting on this contraption he built and off we drove to tow my car to the mechanic.

Yeah, I had to have my car towed because the A#()$&)!! key doesn't fit in the ignition any more.

I am now awaiting the dreaded call from the mechanic to tell me how much I'm going to have to pay through the nose to fix this. Did I mention that my car is a brand that doesn't EXIST any more because it didn't survive the whole economic meltdown? Yeah, it's a LOT of fun to try to get any repairs done on it.

Soooo...that happened.

And now some housekeeping items:

I did manage to get the contest post updated with more pics so be sure to go check it out. That's still not everything that's in the prize package, but I got some stuff photo'd. Contest ends tonight at midnight Pacific time so be sure to go leave a comment on that post if you haven't done so already!

Thanks for all the comments on Ryan's achievement and on my necklaces - all very much appreciated!!

To Mel who asked about waxed cording: I got mine from Ornamentea, but there are plenty of good on-line sources such as Rings 'N Things as well.

If you or anyone you know is into rubber stamping or uses stamps for beady-related stuff such as poly clay or metal clay, I'm going through another round of de-stashing my immense stamp collection. I started listing new stuff last night and will continue throughout the week. Be sure to check it out and/or forward on the link.

I gots car repairs to pay for ya know!

Tune in tomorrow to find out who won the Blogoversary contest!



Lorelei said...

ohmygosh laughing so hard my beer came out my nose.
that does not make sense about the key. i will be checking back for an update on what the heck caused that to happen.
off to look at the giveaway pics....

kelleysbeads said...

AAA is the customer I support. I'm calling them up first thing tomorrow morning to ask how many crazy customers call in to report their one and only ignition key no longer fits the ignition. What the heck?!

SummersStudio said...

How do these things happen to you? It's like aliens visited your car and abducted your key thingy and replaced it with something else. Tell me, please, that it's not aliens! Waiting for an update on the bizarre car :-)

SueBeads said...

Wait - you didn't finish the story woman!!!!! You just went right on to something else (adult add maybe???). So what the heck happened? I would have guessed car not in park, but you do have the funniest stories, so it couldn't be that easy!

Anonymous said...

that is too weird! hope it's not too expensive to repair. sending you some good vibes.

i get all the weird shit happening to me too, except i'm talking in the health department. if a doctor tells me about the RARE effects of a medication or a procedure i have to have. i'm always in that 1% that ends up with the rare side effect, blah.

Danielle said...

You don't have a saturn car do you? Because this has totally happened to me. Except, I take my key and carefully insert it a little. The trick for me has been to match up the outer plate of the keyhole to the keyhole itself. It's hard to explain, but mine was at least a simple fix!

I hope your problem gets fixed inexpensively!

Elisabeth said...

KJ you crack me uuuuuuupppppp! I was laughing so hard my husband asked what was up so I read your post to him and now he's cracking up. We've had a kitchen sink clog that did not respond to 3 bottles of draino (paid the plumber $650 'cause he also found a leaky pipe in the basement) and a car that quit at a busy intersection (new alternator $450). Sigh - if you can't laugh about it what's the point, right? Although winning your blogoversarty giveaway would go a long way towards easing my pain... :-)

lunedreams said...

i have accidentally twisted my ignition key before, in the door lock (same key you know). did you maybe twist it by accident? cause they don't fit when they're twisted. did you eyeball it and see if it was still straight?

Spirited Earth said...

i have had this happen to me..years ago.i however would not call in AAA just kept at it until it worked..mine had something to do with the position of the steering wheel..if i jerked the wheel enought it sort of engaged so the key would work..no clue why..

Spirited Earth said...

hey i just found this online auto forum. read on

Don't just wiggle the wheel, you may have to put some force into trying to turn it left, and right to get the lock to release.
Quite often this happens when parking "quickly" because there is steering pressure on the wheel and tires as the lock engages. Since there is power steering assist when the lock engages, it takes a lot of wheel force to get it to disengage. As a last resort, see if one of your front wheels is against a curb, or wheel stop. If it is, you could get your jack out, and lift that wheel and then you should be able to get the lock to turn. Otherwise then it has to be something in the column

SilverNikNats said...

hehe thats sooo funny I'm still giggling! Hope its not too expensive to fix.

Nicki said...

I am really sorry, but this made me laugh so hard. I know the situation. I was late for work once because my car was the only one parked on a side walk next to where a water pipe broke, and the firemen closed up the entire street including my car to fix it - for half a day. Needless to say I did not get to work that day... So curious what this is about. Might be a problem with the immobilizer?

hello gorgeous said...

OMG! How WIERD is that! It would've had me scratching my head too.....how can that possibly happen???

Unless it was SUCH a hot day that all the metal components expanded in the five minutes of dropping off your son and getting back in the car....was it hot???

It is funny tho' ;o) hope you get it sorted, will be intrigued to find out what the problem was.....


hello gorgeous xxx

Michelle said...

Oh. My. God. I so was thinking that you got into the wrong car (been there). Hope everything works out with your car. Keep us posted.
Bead happy!

Pretty Things said...

I'm so sorry I had to laugh -- only because I've been there! Except it was 5am and I was due to set up at a craft show!

TesoriTrovati said...

Yeah. That did happen to me once in a crappy ass shuttle vehicle. Didn't have the car all the way in park (looked like it was). Horhey and Pancho (aka Francisco) had me rolling. I am so glad you didn't lock your sense of humor in the trunk. You didn't, did you?

Enjoy the day!

Tara P. said...

I know less about cars than anyone in the world and that just ain't right! You crack me up, though - I would have loved to see the look on your face when it happened!