Memories of Halloweens Past...

Happy Halloween! I have to say, outside of Christmas, this has always been my favorite holiday. The change in the weather. The roll-back of the clocks. The free candy. Okay, it’s probably mostly that last one, but still!

At least, this was all true until Halloween last year which turned out to be the worst day of my entire life. I haven’t written too much about it because it’s taken me a long time to get to the point where I COULD write about it. I almost didn’t write anything today, but then I realized that writing about it and marking the date could be a good thing for me.

So, for cathartic purposes and so I can take one more step towards being able to put all this stuff behind me, here’s my story.

This time last year, I was sitting in a bathroom staring with disbelief at a positive pregnancy test. My husband of almost twelve years had just moved out of the house the day before so I was already reeling from the idea of becoming a single parent to one child and now there was going to be another one. The prospect was so unbelievable that I went to the store and bought two more tests just to confirm the results. I even bought one of those tests where the actual word “pregnant” shows up in the window instead of a line. Just to be really, really sure.

You may wonder how I could let this happen considering the break up of the marriage so I’ll explain a bit. First, the break up was, from my perspective anyway, very sudden. In a three week period, I went from being in a committed marriage with a few problems that we were working on to being told it was over and that he was moving out of the house. By the time the pregnancy was detected, I was almost through the first trimester. In addition to that, I had to use fertility treatments to conceive my first child. Pregnancy without medical assistance was not supposed to be possible for me and therefore not something I actively guarded against.

Don’tcha just LOVE the irony? Yeah, me too.

As I sat there looking at those three tests, my brain was on overload. Shock. Disbelief. Anger that this was happening NOW of all times. Happiness (yeah, there was happiness, too) because I’d so desperately wanted to have one more child and the demise of the marriage coupled with my age had made that seem like an impossibility. Terror at the idea of having to go through a pregnancy, delivery and caring for a newborn completely alone. But then I remember having a moment of clarity where this voice in my head just said “It will be hard. Harder than anything you’ve ever done in your life, but you’ll do it. One step at a time and you’ll make it through.”

By the time I walked out of that bathroom, I knew I was in love with and committed to that baby, whatever happened. I planned to tell my ex and my parents that night after my son had finished trick-or-treating and had gone to bed. I didn’t know what to expect from the ex and frankly, I didn’t waste much time thinking about it. As far as I was concerned, he’d made his decision and left his family and even if he changed his mind upon hearing the news (which I neither wanted nor expected), I planned to go forward.

I put a call in to my doctor to schedule a blood test the next morning to confirm things. There were a couple of physical things going on that had me slightly worried, but that could also have been totally normal for early pregnancy. I just wanted to get checked out and make sure everything was okay.

I went on with my day and headed home to take my son to his Halloween activities. The ex arrived to participate (this was when we were still trying to do the “civil getting along” thing) and things went fine during the costume parade and dinner. Then, just before we were to leave to start walking the neighborhood, I felt a dull ache and something of a tearing sensation in my abdomen.

I didn’t know what was going on, but told the ex to go ahead out with our son and I’d catch up with them. I started having cramps and had to take some pain relievers to get them under control. I figured I was either having a miscarriage (in which case there was nothing to be done) or else it was just some wonky, but normal, pregnancy thing that would go away. Little did I know…

I left the house and caught up with the rest of our party and finished walking the neighborhood with them. While we were out there, I still wasn’t feeling too well and ended up having to break the news to the ex as we were walking. That wasn’t my plan, but it was becoming obvious something was up with me so I didn’t really have a choice. He looked stunned, but really didn’t have much of a reaction. To this day, I don’t know if he even believed me. I told him that something was wrong and that I had a blood test scheduled for the next morning. I broke the news to my parents that night, too.

The night didn’t go very well. I had a lot of cramping and had to take more pain relievers, but I also didn’t seem to be miscarrying, either. I went to the blood test the next morning and then in to work. The results came in about mid-day and confirmed that I was, indeed, pregnant. When I told the nurse about my symptoms, she scheduled an ultrasound for me that afternoon.

At the ultrasound, the tech initially couldn’t find an embryo, but commented that there was a lot of blood in my uterus. “That’s it. I’m miscarrying.” I thought, but then, I saw a heartbeat on the monitor (I’d been through this before with my first child and so I knew what to look for) although the tech tried to turn the monitor so I wouldn’t see it . At that point, I thought everything would be okay until she said “I’m going to go get the doctor to speak with you.” They never do that unless it’s bad news so I was prepared for her to come in and tell me I was miscarrying. I was not prepared to hear her say “The pregnancy is ectopic. It’s located in your right Fallopian tube and you need to have surgery TODAY. Like, right now.”

Next thing I knew I was sitting in the doctor’s office frantically calling relatives while the nurse tried to get me scheduled into surgery that afternoon. I called the ex to give him the news and his only reaction was “Well, good luck with that.” To this day, he has never expressed one word of condolence or sympathy over the death of our child and that, more than anything else including what I’ve since learned were multiple affairs, is why I loathe him and consider him a waste of skin. Under those circumstances, I would have offered sympathy even to my worst enemy and here I was married to the man for over a decade and shared a child with him and that’s all he could come up with.

And yeah, I know, he was probably shocked. I get that. But I was in the hospital overnight and recuperating at home for two weeks after that and he could have said or done something during that period. Instead, he chose to use that time to contact a lawyer, file for divorce and have me served with papers.

Where was I while he was doing all that? Well, first I was laying in a bed in the hospital’s surgical “prep” area having to sign forms to eliminate his ability to control any of my medical care or decisions should I be unable to speak for myself and to try to make some provisions for my son’s care and custody. Lovely, eh?

Then I was discussing with the doctor whether or not she would be able to save my Fallopian tube to preserve my ability to have children in the future. Then off I went to surgery.

I found out later that my tube had already ruptured and I’d been bleeding internally for at least 24 hours. It’s a miracle that I didn’t go to sleep Halloween night and bleed to death in my sleep. Of course, they were unable to save the tube due to the damage and I didn’t come out of the surgery very well so although it was supposed to be an outpatient procedure, I ended up being admitted and had to stay overnight at the hospital.

So, in a very short period of time, I lost my marriage, a baby and the ability to have any more children all in one fell swoop.

Then I got served with divorce papers when my incisions (much less my heart) hadn’t even healed yet.

A week later I went in to the doctor’s office for a follow-up visit and had a very weird experience. As I got off the elevator, I passed the ultrasound office where I’d gotten the bad news just a week before and as I did, the hallway seemed to stretch and stretch so that the door to my doctor’s office got farther away the longer I walked towards it. I assume it was some kind of post-traumatic stress thing, but it was awful. Then, as I sat in the waiting room with all the pregnant women and pictures of babies, I started to cry uncontrollably. This sounds totally normal except that I’m someone who almost never cries and I certainly don’t cry uncontrollably. In public. A nurse very quickly hustled me out of there and into a cubicle – don’t want to upset the expecting moms now, do we?

I just realized as I’m writing this that I haven’t been back to my doctor’s office since then and have missed my yearly exam. I hope by now that I can face going in there again, but it will definitely be difficult.

The last year has been a long journey for me. I’ve changed mentally, emotionally and physically…I hope for the better. At the very least, I learned that I’m stronger than I ever thought possible and that there’s very little life could throw at me now that would be worse than what I’ve already been through.

One of the final steps of my recovery is to spend a last bit of time on these memories, write them down, recognize the anniversary for what it is and then move on. Having said all that, I will never stop regretting the loss of the baby and the fact that I probably can’t have any more children. I’ve supposedly got one good tube and one good ovary left, but seeing as how I’m 41 and unmarried, chances are slim.

I’m still angry over the circumstances and the lack of sympathy, support or even plain old acknowledgment from the other party involved. He continues to act to this day as if none of this ever happened and can’t understand why I’m not just happy as a clam to see him and talk to him. I find that attitude to be completely insulting to me and disrespectful to the memory of our child (and yes, I consider that there was a child since I saw the heartbeat).

Those feelings go to the back of my mind at times now instead of being constantly there, but I doubt they will ever go away entirely. Every time I have to see him, or hear his voice on the phone or deal with his “why can’t we just get along” attitude, I literally want to hurl. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve never been anything other than civil to him (especially in front of our son) because I made a decision a long time ago that the kind of person I am is not the kind of person who exposes a young child to anger, bitterness and fighting. It’s just REALLY FREAKIN’ HARD to do.

It was a terrible thing to go through, but I like to think that I have come out the other side as a stronger, better person. I certainly know that MY honor and integrity are intact. I’m not a vow-breaker or a liar. I’m blessed with one phenomenal kid and I’m doing my best to be worthy of the honor of being his mother.

I started this entry off by saying “Happy Halloween” and I’m sure anyone who has read to this point is thinking that was a crazy intro to something this sad, but despite what happened last year, I’m looking forward to seeing tonight’s activities through my son’s eyes. There’s nothing like that child-like wonder to chase away any bad associations I might have with this date.

I’d also like to say a special thank you to all the family and friends who have been there and supported me over the last year – without you and my faith in God, I wouldn’t have made it!

So, I hope everyone has a wonderful time tonight. Enjoy the children whether they are your own or those who come to your door. Take time to see the sparkle and wonder in their eyes and recognize it for the miracle that it is.

Oh, and don’t forget to snatch a piece of candy (or two) for yourself! I know I will!

KJ

“The world breaks everyone and afterward many are stronger at the broken places.”
--Ernest Hemingway

I've got game!

But more about that later

It’s just got to be time for a book review again. I know, I promised I’d post more frequently, but then, you know, life happens when you’re not expecting it and the last week or so has been totally insane. New job = busy. Single mom (with no help from grandparents as they are on vacay this week) = busier. Work outs, errands, Halloween prep, dating (see, told you I had game) and miscellaneous other crap = insane.

Then there’s all that reading I have to do just so I can review the books later because I’m selfless like that. So, here goes. The first book is “Dragon’s Tongue" by Laura J. Underwood. I first became aware of Ms. Underwood’s work when she had a number of short stories published in various anthologies and in “Marion Zimmer Bradley’s Fantasy Magazine.” I’m surprised that she hasn’t had as much success as some of Bradley’s other protégés like Mercedes Lackey or Jennifer Roberson because her stories are equally well written (if not better), but it’s nice to see she’s finally got a novel out there. “Dragon’s Tongue” has a bit of a “Harry Potter” feeling to it as the main character, Alaric Braidwine, is a young wizard arriving for training at a mage college, but the similarities end there. He’s paired with the feckless but powerful Fenelon Greenfyn as his mentor. Keltora, the background world in this book, is well developed with a great sense of ancient history to give it shape and believability. I felt there were a few “novice writer” elements in the plot, but they were barely detectable and everything else is so well done that it was certainly more entertaining than either Lackey or Roberson’s most recent works. This is a good one, folks, and I highly recommend it.

From there, I moved on to one of the more original werewolf stories I’ve come across in Kit Whitfield’s “Benighted.” In this world, the majority of the population are “lunes” or werewolves. A tiny minority are “normal” human beings or “barebacks” who are considered to be cripples and given almost leper-like status by the rest of the world. However, it’s their job to keep control of the “lunes”, particularly on full-moon nights, and make sure they don’t rampage out of control and cause damage. The book is beautifully written with an almost poetic, sing-song voice, but sometimes I got a little tired of the main character’s endless, drippy, introspection and wished it had been broken up by more action. I also had a problem with the basic idea of the background world – it seems to me that nature would not allow for the naturally predatory species (the lunes) to outnumber their potential “prey” animals (the barebacks). Also, there’s no correlation between actual wolf behavior and lune behavior. Lunes are far more aggressive and savage than real wolves. Some of this can be accepted as peculiarities of this particular world, but there’s a point at which it stretches the readers’ ability to suspend disbelief. Still, the author has done a powerful job of exploring the theme of prejudice and it’s easy to re-characterize the lunes and barebacks as blacks and whites in South Africa before apartheid was abolished. I would sum this book up as thought-provoking and worth the read, but I wouldn’t take it to the beach or on an airplane. It’s not much “fun.”

Lastly, there’s “On Basilisk Station” by David Weber. This book is the first in the well-known “Honor Harrington” series which I’ve known about for a long time, but for some reason had just never picked up. The good part of that is that there are a zillion books out now in this series so I’ll be reading them for a long time to come. Weber has taken C.S. Forester’s famous “Horatio Hornblower” series (which, by the way, if you haven’t seen the A&E movies of this series – run, don’t walk, to the video store and rent the DVD’s…SO well done and Iaon Gruffudd is H-O-T) and translated it into space. Captain Honor Harrington of the Royal Manticoran Navy is about to accept her first command – an old, but serviceable cruiser known as HMS Fearless. Lots of action and military tactics ensue. As is typical of military novels, the character development (especially of secondary characters) is somewhat lacking but at least it’s not totally non-existent. I give this book an A+ for action, military strategy/tactics, the politics behind the scenes and the hard science behind the starship drives, weapons, communications, and the physics governing any potential battle in space. However, if you want “deeper” characters, then I recommend Lois McMaster Bujold’s “Miles Vorkosigan” saga.

In other news, it looks like the divorce will be final soon. We’re in the final paperwork stages so maybe I’ll have my maiden name back before 2006 is out. The next few days will be hard on me, though, as the one-year anniversary of everything blowing up arrives, but I hope to weather the storm by focusing on Halloween activities with my son and being thankful for all the good things in my life – family, friends, job, health, etc.

While the generic idea of “being divorced” still makes me sad, I know that I am a far healthier, happier and different person today than I would have been had things continued on as they were. The truth is, the other person involved never really loved me or accepted me for who I am and spent nearly 12 years convincing me that he was right about me. It took getting his boot off my neck for me to wake up and realize that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with me. In fact, I’m quite fabulous, a helluva catch and any guy would be lucky to have me on his arm should I deign to allow that.

The real pity is that I spent so many years letting someone else’s judgment of me as “wrong” and “inferior” so color my picture of myself when in reality, he was the one unworthy of me. It’s amazing how such a seemingly small realization has re-shaped my entire life (not to mention my body). I finally feel like I’ve been set free to be the person I should have been all along. It’s weird to be “re-born” at the age of 41!

Of course, it hasn’t hurt that I had a great 2nd date with architect-guy last Saturday night. I wore my new, size 10(!) black jeans and a short-sleeved wrap top with a black, pink and blue paisley design. I’d post links, but they’re not in the Macy’s on-line store as far as I can tell. So, I’ll have to share the picture of this lovely coat I got on sale this weekend. I fell in love with this when it first came into the store in late summer, but it was out of my budget range. Even on sale, it was still pricey, but so pretty I couldn't pass it up. Because, you know, one sooo needs a coat in Southern California. Especially during fire season.

Anyway, back to the date. We had a fabulous time at the Sorrento Grille in Laguna Beach. I had the lamb chops with some kind of sherry/maple gravy that was to die for and then we walked around and looked at some of the art galleries and had ice cream. It was a treat to be with someone not only funny and charming but intelligent as well.

I’d forgotten what it was like to converse with someone whose brain actually functions. It really made me notice how everything with the ex was just such a freakin’ major EFFORT. No wonder I was tired all the time and didn’t have any energy to do anything else. All my energy went into doing the thinking for two people.

Fortunately, that’s a thing of the past and I had a fun, relaxing, effortless evening that ended with a very nice kiss (shhh! don’t tell my mother). Here's hoping for date #3 which will (oh darn) require another date outfit).

That’s it. Happy weekend all and don’t forget those oxygen masks to keep the smoke out!

KJ

What's that smell?

Ah yes, fall in Southern California. I just love the crispness of the air (it's 86 degrees out), the bright blue sky (it's hidden in haze, smoke, orange sun glare and ashes)and the way it makes me feel (my sinuses are burning from the dry, smoke-laden Santa Ana winds and a sinus migraine is not far off).

Yes, fall is definitely my favorite time of year. Except for that pesky "fire season" thing...

KJ

It's Jewelry-licious!

Note to self: Stop listening to KIIS-FM. Too much Fergie is bad for the brain (apparently).

I was able to make up some earrings over the weekend and thought I'd post some pics (Sparkle - all of these should be in the mail to you today).

The earrings in this picture feature hand-painted ceramic beads as focal points and I've added Bali vermeil spacers and, on the top pair in the picture, smoky quartz rondelles.



More hand-painted ceramic beads from the same artist, but this time I've added Bali silver and labradorite rondelles.



These earrings feature hand-painted Russian lacquerwork which traditionally depicts a scene from a legend or fairy tale. This is a picture of the legendary firebird or phoenix. I've added Bali vermeil spacers. I had planned to use black Swarovski crystals as well, but the focal beads are so pretty by themselves I decided that "less is more" was the way to go so as not to detract from them.



These earrings are some smaller pieces featuring more Russian lacquerwork in shades of gold and blue on black. I've added the Swarovski crystals to these because the focals are smaller and the images are not as strong.



The lavender bead-embroidered bracelet is almost done - I'm just finishing the beaded edging and should be able to shoot some pictures soon.

In non-jewelry-related news, the guy from Saturday night wants to go out again. I'm not sure whether to be thrilled or scared to death. I'm walking the fine line in between for now. Oh, and now that he's seen the one awesome date outfit I have...what the hell do I wear for date #2?

KJ

Site Update!

Yes, folks, it's true! Silver Parrot Designs has finally been updated. No more references to May or springtime (now that it's fall). Please pick yourselves up off the floor now!

I've got a new item of the week, an addition to the necklaces section and lots of new gallery photos so feel free to head over and check things out.

In other news, I hit the OC bead/gem faire this weekend mostly to pick staples like headpins, jump rings and earring hooks (since a certain person keeps whining about not getting her earrings yet) and then I'd planned to be outta there. But, of course, a few other things caught my eye.

What, you want pictures now? Oh, well, okay. If you insist! In addition to some pretty sterling silver beads and earring findings (which just wouldn't scan very well), I picked up these handpainted ceramic beads from Africa and pendants from an East Coast porcelain artist:



I guess I was on a "clay" roll, because then I found the ceramic artist that I love so much but who, up until now, has only shown his work at the L.A. Gift Show. Usually, he carries Russian lacquerwork as well, but this time only brought his hand-painted porcelain beads. So, while I didn't get any more lacquerwork (serious bummer!) I did get some lovely porcelain beads:



And this stunning, hand-painted pendant:



I wish the true beauty of these beads came out in the scans - they all have a highly-polished surface with touches of metallic and an almost mirror-like quality to them. Truly outstanding and unusual.

I spent the rest of today making earrings for a friend - she bought the beads from this same vendor back in July at the L.A. show. I'll post photos of them tomorrow.

On a personal note, it looks like the divorce stuff will be done soon. We reached an agreement on the final outstanding item so now it's just a matter of paperwork and signatures assuming no one changes anything (and by no one, I of course mean the other party involved). I'm looking forward to getting on with my life as this has been dragging on for a year as of the end of this month. While I know it's the best thing for me because I am much happier now (not to mention 60 lbs. lighter), it's still sad to see something like this come to an end. I can only hope that I've shielded my son from as much of the fallout as possible and that he'll grow up healthy and happy and without too much impact from this.

As for me, well, I did go on my date last night and had a very nice time. It was great to get out and have adult conversation and some nice food with a guy who complimented me on my looks (almost fell outta my chair - haven't heard a guy say that to me since...well...ever, really) and seemed to enjoy my company. What a refreshing change after twelve years with someone who went out of his way on a daily basis to make sure that I knew I was not up to his standards in pretty much every category possible. It just goes to show that there is life after divorce...and a pretty good life at that.

Hope everyone had a great weekend!

KJ

Book Review

It’s book review time again (er, finally).

(Insert loud huzzahs and fanfare.)

Okayyyyyy.

(Insert sound of crickets chirping.)

Anyway, I’ve got a semi-decent crop of stuff to talk about starting with “The Privilege of the Sword” by Ellen Kushner. I picked this up thinking it held an intriguing mix of Jane Austen-esqueness along with sword-fighting and a mad duke. These are some of my favorite things (well, not the mad duke part, but you get the idea). And while it does have those, and is actually interesting and well-written, I’m just bored to death with the whole homosexual politics thing. It’s not new or shocking or even interesting in this day and age and I get so damned tired of strong female characters who “suddenly” discover their homosexuality. I mean, really, at this point, what would be new and interesting would be a female sword fighter (or fire fighter, or policewoman, etc.) who ISN’T gay. I’m over it. It’s also possible that my enjoyment and understanding of this book was affected by the fact that it’s a sequel to a previous book called “Swordspoint” which I haven’t read and which may provide greater insight into the characters. Cool cover art, though.

I moved on to “I See You” by Holly Lisle. This book features a female paramedic who, surprisingly, is not gay. In fact, she leaps into bed with the hero mere moments after meeting him and yeah, I know it’s a romance/thriller crossover, but come on, people! I’ve never bought this whole “instant mystical attraction so powerful that it cannot be denied” thing. It’s just stupid. Despite that fact, this book might’ve been pretty good had it not been a complete and total re-do of Lisle’s earlier book, “Midnight Rain,” which was much more cleverly done. At least in that version, I didn’t figure out the main plot twist during the intro.

Next comes “Webmage” by Kelly McCullough. This book is a bit newbie-ish, but still provides a fun-filled romp through a world that’s an interesting mish-mash of computer technology, Greek mythology and sorcery. I suspect that it would’ve been even more entertaining if I had even the remotest knowledge of computer programming. While the author seems overly concerned with proving just how closely he (and yes, it’s a “he” – if you can’t tell from the sex scenes, check out the bio at the end of the book) paid attention in his Mythology and Folklore 101 class. He does this by constantly tossing about bits of obscure Greek myths so brush up on your Mount Olympus Tales, folks. It is interesting to see these characters brought to life in this particular universe, though. The book is funny and action-packed and I’ll definitely keep an eye out for the author’s next novel.

Then it was time to “get my shallow on” by checking out the latest installment of Mary Janice Davidson’s “Undead” series. Betsy Taylor is back in all her blond bimbo, shoe-obsessed, vampire queen glory in “Undead and Unpopular.” Not much has changed since the last book. She’s still planning her wedding, her baby brother is still colicky, and she still has “issues” with her housemates and her fiancé, Eric Sinclair. Although the book is fun, it’s my least favorite of the series so far because it doesn’t have much in the way of plot. The question of why there’s suddenly a zombie in the attic is never resolved (the better to make us all shell out for the next book, I’m sure) and the other main issue, the visiting vampire delegation from Europe, resolves itself off-stage without any input from any of the main characters. When the book ends, you’re sort of left with a “that’s it?” feeling as you search through the final pages to see if you’ve perhaps missed a few…hundred. I say wait for the paperback edition on this one.

Last, but not least, is “Firestorm,” the latest from Rachel Caine’s “Weather Warden” series. Always well done, these books are a fun, action-filled ride with the main character, Joanne Baldwin, constantly getting in deeper and deeper er…well, you know, just deeper. This time she’s up against Mother Nature herself and, as the famous commercial once claimed, it’s not nice to piss off Mother Nature. Okay, okay, the commercial said “fool” but I figure the theory still holds. On top of that, the Djinn have gone nutso, Joanne’s sister is in the hands of a sociopathic wingnut by the name of Eamon, demons and natural disasters are busting out all over and the Wardens are getting their butts kicked in every corner of the globe. The resolution was a little too quick and I also wonder who you get as guest-star villain after you’ve already had Mother Nature in the role. That’s kind of a hard act to follow. However, you definitely won’t be bored. This one also has cool cover art. Next installment of the series is due out July, 2007. This is kind of a long time to wait. *Pout*

Have a good weekend everyone!

KJ

P.S. Oh, and Sparkle? That comment about the earrings? Subtle, very subtle (not). I haven’t forgotten! In fact, headed to a bead show this weekend and will keep an eye out for fun things to add to your focal beads. Oh, and earring hooks…I need earring hooks. Sorta hard to make earrings without ‘em!

P.P.S. I’ve been asked on a date! Now, where DID I put those red stilettos…

It's Picture Day!

Hey, look, an actual picture of jewelry on a jewelry blog. What a novel concept.

This is the lavender/green embroidered bracelet that I’ve been working on forever (it seems like forever anyway). I finally finished the embroidery part and thought I’d do a quick scan before it gets applied to the bracelet blank because it’s so much harder for me to get any kind of a picture once this project gets three dimensional and won’t fit in the scanner any more. I have a new camera now, though, so hopefully the pictures will come out better this time.

Anyway, this stage is done and I’ve got the purple ultrasuede backing already applied to the bracelet blank. Next step is to finish cutting out this piece, glue it to the top of the bracelet blank and then do the beaded edging and I’ll be DONE.

I’ve already got the next embroidery project underway, but it’ll be eons before it’s even close to being finished. Still, I learn something every time I do one of these projects. In this one, I improved on my color selection and did a better job measuring the pieces and staying within the measured boundaries. I like the scattering of pearls throughout the piece as accents, but I’m not so happy with my idea of alternating size 15 seed beads with size 11 seed beads in the body of the bracelet. It works okay to do it in the bezel around the center cab, but doesn’t work so well elsewhere. I also need to work on not crowding the beads together too much. A little more room here and there will help improve the look of things. Finally, I need to do a few more “outline rings” around the larger beads so I get more of a “pond ripple” effect there. Overall, though, I think this project is an improvement over my first bracelet project.

These guys do take such an awfully long time. Maybe it’s time for another earring project to switch things up. Hmmm….

I wanna new drug...

Hi. I’m KJ and I have a shoe addiction. I’m telling you, shoes
are the new crack and zappos.com is the new dealer in town.

I mean, really, “brocade ribbon AND an ornate crystal buckle.” This pair is beads, jewelry, sparkly stuff AND a shoe all rolled into one. I’m powerless to resist.

Help me.

Must...resist...lure of... shoes ...that don’t...go with...anything I own (but are really super cute nonetheless). If nothing else, I'm just enjoying the fact that shoes are even AVAILABLE in a color called "cyclamen."

And as long as I’m going to hell anyway, I may as well go straight for the hooker shoes, right? Figures this design came from JLo. Although this pair in purple is slightly less hookerish and more 40’s bombshell which, with my curves, is a look that so works for me. And now that I think about it, they would go with my new gray suit...

Hmmm...would it be, um, bad form to wear hot shoes to work?

Of course, it may be too late for me to worry about that now considering I’ve already worn red, patent leather, ankle-strap peep-toes AND cheetah-print stilettos (yes, Sparkle, on two separate occasions) to work. Hee!

But, the pair I will probably actually buy (because I’m so annoyingly practical...er MOST of the time) is this pair. Second choice is this pair in dark blue.

Now, where did I put that winning lotto ticket? Oh, and if a certain SOMEONE would hurry up and ask me out on a date, already, I’d have a place to maybe actually WEAR some of these beauties besides the office. Getting compliments from co-workers is not nearly as nice as watching a guy trip because he’s busy staring at your legs and thinking lascivious thoughts. I know, because I made the whole guy-trip thing happen once this summer by way of the Anne Klein “killer sandals” (as previously mentioned here) and a knee-length denim skirt and it was quite an enjoyable experience.

Did I mention I only have 5 lbs. to go to hit my initial weight-loss goal and I look fa-bu-lous in a size 12? Okay, conceited, I know, but I’ve worked REALLY hard to get this far so I figure it’s okay to take some well-deserved pride in my accomplishment.

KJ

P.S. As long as you’re sharing in my obsession(s), check out this totally cute purse .

P.S. Update

A little update to the post-script of the last entry. Turns out what they're actually singing is "Go ahead, be gone with it."

But my way is funnier ;-)

Have a great weekend, everyone!

KJ

Book Review

I’ve finally had a few spare minutes to put a book review together so here it is.

I’d like to review “Karavans” by Jennifer Roberson, but I’m not sure it’s fair to review a book that I haven’t finished. I’ve tried like heck to slog my way through this book for about the last month and I’ve finally given up. I just don’t care what happens to these characters. You know, it’s one thing to do gradual character development and drop tantalizingly obscure clues about the exact nature of some of the main characters, but there’s a point where it just stretches on for too long and I lose interest. I’m two-thirds of the way through this stupid story and I still don’t know what the Shoia are or what Alisano really is or does or why it’s such a threat. The book is called “Karavans” and yet the karavan has only JUST NOW left the rendez-vous point and now it’s TURNING BACK! Yawn.

It’s a shame because I always enjoyed Roberson’s “Sword Dancer” and “Cheysuli” (okay, Jenie, you can stop making gagging noises over there in the corner…I can hear ya, you know) series and I was thrilled to hear she’d finally gotten around to putting out some new books. I’m very disappointed.

So, I suppose those of you with more patience than I have could still go and give this book a try (especially once it comes out in paperback) but I’m officially calling it quits. Do me a favor, though, if anyone does check this out…come by here and let me know if it ever got any better, m’kay?

Thank goodness for the next book that, in stark contrast to “Karavans”, was a rip-roaring ride from beginning to end. Only took me about 3 days to finish this one and I had to force myself to put it down each night to get some sleep. I’m talking about “The Lies of Locke Lamora” by Scott Lynch. This book got a lot of great press prior to its release and I’m glad to say it doesn’t disappoint. The story follows the career of a gang of thieves and con-men known as the “Gentlemen Bastards.” I’d describe it as a bit of “The Sting” meets “The Godfather” set in a Renaissance-era Venice that was built by a vanished alien race and which is currently endowed with magic and lots of nasty sea creatures (don’t go swimming in the harbor!). It sounds like there’s way too much going on, but Lynch manages to pull all these disparate elements together to create an interesting and fresh-feeling background world (which is getting harder and harder to do these days) peopled with colorful characters.

This is Lynch’s first published novel as far as I can tell and it does have a few rookie mistakes in it, but they are so minor as to be barely noticeable. Lynch employs a shifting time-stream method of telling this story – flipping back and forth between “present” events and Locke and the gang’s childhood training. While not a mistake in and of itself, it’s just not a technique I’m particularly fond of. It does serve to break up the almost incessant action of the current storyline, though, so it’s effective in that sense. The other things that bugged me a bit were a couple of characters whose storylines were never really resolved. One never actually makes it on-stage in this book at all, but is just referred to very frequently. I assume she’ll make an appearance in a sequel, but still, a bit annoying. Another character gets done away so rapidly that the reader wonders why that character was even necessary to begin with. Lastly, I thought a couple of the plot points were fairly simple and obvious – which flies in the face of Lock Lamora being the most “clever” thief around. It made me wonder why he wasn’t able to “out think” the opposition on a couple of occasions or come up with better plans. Again, these things are so minor that they certainly didn’t detract from the enjoyment of the book. I had no problem paying full price for the hardcover version and I’ll definitely be looking out for a sequel.

Oh, and one small warning. There’s a definite dose of violence in this book (it is about gangsters, thieves and murderers after all) so steer clear if you can’t handle that. Also, I wouldn’t get overly attached to any of the characters…

That’s it for this week.

KJ

P.S. Does anyone else think that part of the chorus in Justin Timberlake’s song “Sexy Back” sounds like the backup singers are singing “go ahead big boner”? Or is it just me…

Kids say the darndest things

So, tonight when I was putting some 1% hydrocortisone cream on my son's face, he asked what I was doing. I explained it to him and he responded "but mommy, why do you have to put hieroglyphics on my face?"

After I picked myself up off the floor from laughing, I had to spend the next 15 minutes explaing the difference between hydrocortisone and hieroglpyhics. To a 3-year-old. I can hardly wait until he needs help with his calculus homework...

KJ

P.S. I've finally solved all the problems related to updating the website. I've got access to the server and I have Dreamworks software re-loaded on my computer. So, updates will be forthcoming the next time I have a free weekend...which should be in about 2 weeks.

Mall Redux

Overheard at the mall today:

Approx. mid-twenties Girl #1: (points to patent leather shoes) "I really hate all these plastic shoes.

Friend of Girl #1: "Yeah. Plastic is totally gross."

I swear - did the mothers of this generation teach them NOTHING at all about fashion?

But, I didn't let it bother me because I woke up to a wonderful surprise this morning. Despite having a cold for the past few days and fighting a certain monthly intrusion of Mother Nature and having therefore suspended the dieting and working out during this time period, I got on the scale this morning to find that I'd dropped FIVE POUNDS since Friday!!! I have no idea how this happened considering that I never made it to the gym after Tuesday and I ate (shhhh!) cookies on Thursday AND Friday. But hey - whatever works!

Woo Hoo! 5 more lbs. to my initial goal, baby!

And when I reach that goal - these are what I'm buying myself as a reward!

Go me!

KJ

Bathroom Whisperers

There’s this weird phenomenon that I’ve noticed and I can’t decide if it’s just happening to me or if everyone knows about it and just doesn’t say anything? I’m talking about “bathroom whisperers.” Have you ever been in a restroom and heard the person in the next stall whispering to herself? Because it happens to me a lot. There were two of them at my last job – and they did it every time they came in the restroom. I’ve encountered them out in public (well, public restrooms) as well. And now there’s one here at my new job.

What is up with this? It’s not people talking softly on a cell phone. Although I’ve heard that happen, too, and it’s just wrong. There are some places where you should be “temporarily unavailable.” Call the person back for heaven’s sake – that’s what voice mail is for!). But bathroom whisperers are different. They’re just talking to themselves in a whisper the entire time they’re in the bathroom from the moment they enter until they come out of the stall. They only stop when they realize someone else is there. And yet, I can never understand what they’re saying. What’s so important that you have to tell yourself about it in the restroom? And repeat it over and over in a whisper?

It’s weird…and kinda creepy, too. I want to understand what causes it (because I’m all scientific and stuff like that, yo) but mostly I just want it to stop because it’s weirding me out, dude.

Just me?

Bueller?

{sound of crickets chirping}

Okay then.

KJ

P.S. The marine layer is back with a vengeance so that means the good hair phenomenon is history. Not to be seen again for 3-10 years (I noticed that seemed to be about the normal span between previous occurrences).

Good Hair Days

Let it be known and proclaimed throughout the world that on this date in history, I experienced the rare noteworthy event known as a “Good Hair Day.” I know, I know, but really, it’s true. I wouldn’t lie about something like this (well, okay, I would, but in this case, I’m not). Today’s hair has exactly the right amount of “poofiness” to look like natural body without approaching either Texas Big Hair or 80’s poodleness. It’s not frizzy and it didn’t fall flat.

This made me nostalgic for the known “Good Hair Days” of years gone by:

October 31, 2003: Perfect, thick, shiny hair – brought to you by post-partum hormones. This one was actually captured on FILM! Sadly, the picture fell victim to the great re-organization project of ’04 in which I lost more stuff than I actually organized. The hair also fell victim…or rather, it just fell out when the hormones departed. Sigh. I miss that hair.

June 1, 1994: Test drive of hairstyle for upcoming wedding. Sadly, hairstyle on actual wedding day did not live up to the promise of the test drive (nervous bride = sweaty, droopy bangs). Maybe it was an omen?

February 27, 1985: Ah yes, the 80’s. When it took me 3 hours from shower to finished product to do my hair and it still never looked right – except for this one date. My layered perm was at just the perfect stage where it had relaxed enough to not be frizzy, but the roots hadn’t grown out straight yet. My perms always had about a 3-day span during which they looked the way I wanted them to. This particular span happened to coincide with the ZBT “Red Light Affair” party. So, after the appropriate application of gold-glitter-filled mousse and Sebastian Freeze ‘N Shine Spray and a skillful two-hour session of diffuser, hot rollers and curling iron, I donned my hooker costume (now that I think about it – there were an awful lot of “hooker-related” party themes in college and yet we girls just kept falling for it) and headed out. Sadly, this moment of hair perfection was short-lived due to a group of drunken party attendees who thought that “beer showers” sounded like a good idea. R.I.P. perfect hair.

December 25, 1982: Christmas of my senior year in high school – shortly before I made the fateful (and saaaaadly misguided) decision that I was “bored” with long hair and wanted to be the blonde Pat Benatar instead. I thought I was hot stuff for about 2 seconds until my boyfriend of the time saw the new ‘do and commented “Nice. How long will it take to grow back?” Actually, I don’t think my hair has ever forgiven me for that whole debacle because that’s right about the time it started to get darker and darker until I had to start dyeing it blonde.

Ah, the glory days.

KJ

P.S. Today’s great hair day brought to you by a can of Tresemme “Ultra Light Mist” hairspray and the lack of a marine layer (also known as “fog” for you non-Southern Californians).

Poll and Book Review

So, now that everyone’s had a chance to catch up on just how truly fascinating life at chez divorced single mom is, here’s the question for the day. What’s the appropriate action to take when one is approached by a guy who seems perfectly nice and with whom one appears to have things in common, but who is not so hot in the looks department?

Things to keep in mind while answering this question:

1. Number of other current prospects = 0
2. Guy is not a troll – just no initial sparks and isn’t really “my type.”
3. There’s no way in hell a guy who IS “my type” will EVER ask me out. I have aspirations waaayyyy beyond the boundary of my league.
4. The ethics of encouraging someone’s attention when you strongly suspect there’s no future in it due to lack of attraction.
5. Wondering what it would be like to be in the driver’s seat for a change. This includes the semi-bitchy and no doubt immature desire to be the “just not that into it” party (i.e. the one who doesn’t care about returning phone calls and/or has no motivation to stress over whether the other party likes her or not).
6. Number of other current prospects = 0
7. The desire not to “settle” ever again. Because look how well that turned out the first time…
8. The chance to be the hot half of the equation for once.
9. The opportunity for free dinners and adult conversation.
10. My experience with really good looking guys (which, admittedly, is somewhat limited) is that they are major jerks.
11. ANYTHING is better than sitting home alone on Friday nights watching re-runs of “What Not to Wear” for pregnant women, right?
12. Did I mention this is the only game in town right now? I mean, yes, Cowboy Guy finally e-mailed me back, but it was a kind of strange, intense e-mail and I’m thinking I may need to just back away from that situation. So Looks 3 Guy (as in “dance 10, looks 3” – it’s a “Chorus Line” reference…rent the movie) is pretty much where it’s at right now. There was one other guy who sent me a wink and I responded, but nothing back from him since then so I’m not even giving him a cute nickname for the blog.

Okay, that’s it. The polls are open. Remember, my dating future is in your hands (but no pressure).

Now, on to the books. Yes, I’m actually doing a review on Friday like I’m supposed to. Try not to fall over in shock.

I won’t bore you with reviews of the dating self-help books I read because they were, for the most part, a waste of time. However, there’s one small exception – although it’s not really a “self-help” book so I have no idea why it was in that section of the store, but it was so I suppose the store considers it to be self-help so that’s how I’ll have to refer to it. I’m talking about “Between Boyfriends” by Cindy Chupack, a former writer and executive producer for “Sex and the City.” It’s a collection of amusing anecdotes and essays about her dating experiences – I’m guessing some of these are things that were pitched as episodes for the TV show but didn’t make the cut. She’s got a great sense of humor, the stories are amusing and ring very true (which is funny and yet it’s kinda sad at the same time to know that’s what awaits me out there in the deep, dark waters of the dating world). I particularly liked her idea of the “male harem.” Always wanted to get me one of those. Anyway, if you know anyone who’s single or who is “between boyfriends” I highly recommend this book as a little pick-me-up and something to do on those Friday nights when even the losers of the world have failed to ask you out.

Next is “Kitty Goes to Washington” by Carrie Vaughn. This is the second book about Kitty, the late night radio talk show host and her (mis)adventures as a werewolf. In this installment, Kitty is called to Washington, DC, to testify before a Senate committee on the supernatural. This would seem far-fetched unless one remembers that Dee Snyder, the frontman for “Twisted Sister,” once testified before Congress and a werewolf seems tame compared to that. Along the way, Kitty runs afoul of the local vampire community, a rather sinister government medical lab and an Unseelie sidhe preacher who claims he can “cure” vampirism and lycanthropy. When I reviewed Vaughn’s first book in this series, I commented that it was obvious she was a novice writer, but she had some good material to work with and hopefully would hone her craft in later installments. The good news is that this book definitely has a tighter plot structure and flows a lot better than the first one did. The bad news is that there are still a number of “rookie” mistakes here – chief among them being a particular TV broadcast that Kitty convinces the people around her to allow under circumstances that one would have to be totally gonzo nuts (not to mention stupid) to allow a TV broadcast. This was far more unbelievable than her being called to testify at a Senate hearing. The supporting cast of characters was more thoroughly fleshed out this time even though some of them are clichés and at least one of them appears to be a direct rip-off from Laurell K. Hamilton’s “Anita Blake” books. Although, I find I’m not that broken up about it. If I can end up with a series that has all the fun and excitement of the original Anita books without all the “Penthouse Letters” style porn of the later books then I say bring it on. This book was a definite improvement over the first book so I look forward to the next installment to see if the remaining problems can be resolved.

That’s it for this week. Happy Labor Day weekend, everyone! Drive safely!!

KJ

A Day in the Life

It’s been brought to my attention (ahem!) that I haven’t been updating this blog enough. Since non-updated blogs are a particular peeve of mine on other sites (note to self to put that on the next list of peeves), I shall try to rectify the situation. However, when you read (or rather sleep) your way through what my daily life is like, you’ll understand why I haven’t been updating more frequently.

Friday, August 25, 2006
Work all day at new job.
4 PM start wondering what to do with myself on a Friday night since the kidlet will not be home.
4:45 remember that South Coast Plaza is only minutes away and will allow me to miss the festival of fun that is Friday night rush hour on the 405.
5 PM – 7:30 PM spend way too much money buying clothes that I won’t wear for dates I don’t have even though I only went there to pick up one shirt at Coldwater Creek. See “The Container Store” as I’m leaving the main mall and remember that my makeup desperately needs to be organized and that I haven’t been able to find makeup organizers at Target. Spend an hour in the store just enjoying all the organizational possibilities that I will never get around to using. Find the perfect makeup organizers and gleefully cart them home.
7:30-8 PM drive home. At home, walk by kidlet’s room, notice how empty and quiet it is and get sad and teary. Try to call kidlet at ex’s house. Get voicemail.
8-8:30 PM Eat energy bar and water for dinner – I live the high life, I tell ya!
8:30-10 PM Waste time on match.com, blogging and bead websites. Discover ex’s profile on match.com. Resist urge to throw up (despite brief consideration that it will help in the weight dept.).
10 PM-12 AM Waste time watching shows I DVR’d during the week. “What Not to Wear” is a re-run specializing in pregnant and post-pregnant women. Be reminded that I cannot have any more children. Great.

Saturday, August 26, 2006
8 AM get up, eat breakfast and start load of laundry.
8:15 AM realize that wet laundry from last weekend never made it out of washing machine into dryer and is now funkifying the inside of the washing machine. Re-wash entire load w/ extra chemicals to combat the funk.
9 AM begin endless round of phone calls coordinating family visit later in the day. In between calls, review wardrobe for items that are now too big but still have tags on and can be returned to stores. Organize items into appropriate piles by store and match up receipts. Congratulate myself on having organized my receipts last month so that I can actually FIND them now.
11 AM finish phone calls.
11:05 AM first of family arrives.
12 PM pick up lunch at Subway (hey, do you SEE how busy my schedule is? no time for cooking, people!)
2:30 PM family leaves. Debate whether to take a nap and then remember that I’m out of milk, I need a bottle of wine for the party I’m going to tonight, and the kidlet needs socks. Realize that if I run the errands REALLY fast that I’ll still have time for a pedicure before going to the gym.
2:30-4 PM Go to Old Navy to take advantage of the 8 for $10 deal on children’s socks. While there, remember that the denim jacket I bought at Target last month is going back to the store because it’s too big and therefore I am denim-jacketless and notice that there three or four cute styles of denim jackets at Old Navy. Waste 30 minutes trying them on and realizing that I am too old to shop at Old Navy for myself. Get Ryan’s socks and slink out of store wishing I had the figure to pull off “skinny jeans.” Start to head for nail salon and then realize that I will not be able to put on socks and gym shoes to work out on top of a fresh pedicure. Cancel pedicure idea and go to grocery store instead. Buy milk, wine, “People” magazine to read at the gym, and some snack type thingies for kidlet’s lunches during the week. Waste time in the self-checkout line behind idiots who don’t know how to use the machines before finally giving up and going to wait in a regular checkout line. Go to bank to deposit paycheck. Am now 30 minutes late to get to the gym.

4-4:30 PM Race home, change into sweats and start to head out the door. Phone rings and I start to ignore it only to realize it’s the ex calling to let me talk to the kidlet. Spend 15 minutes listening to the three year old’s description of going fishing with his dad and how great his dad is and how much fun he’s having. Get depressed because I miss him so much.

4:30-4:45 PM Drive to gym. Realize as I pull in the parking lot that I left the house without my purse so not only do I not have my driver’s license, I also don’t have my gym card. Decide to go inside anyway and hope obnoxiously thin teenagers manning the desk will give me a pass this time.

4:45-5 PM Make it past the front desk and head to the locker room to put my stuff away only to realize that not only do I not have any stuff (having left it at home) but I also don’t have my lock either.

5-6:30 PM Work out. Feel like a dork that there is a cute guy on the treadmill next to me who I am too embarrassed to talk to. Distract myself from how much I hate working out by trying to see if there’s a ring on his left hand without him noticing what I’m doing. Fail miserably. Up the incline degrees on the treadmill machine to distract myself from how pathetic I am.

6:30-7 PM Drive home, eat energy bar, promise my inner anorexic I will not overindulge in alcohol or high-calorie snacks at the party, shower. Discover that skirt I planned to wear to party is now in “to be returned” pile because it’s too big.

7-7:30 PM Re-think entire wardrobe strategy which results in total destruction of closet and bedroom to be cleaned up later when I’m not running late.

7:30-8 PM Do hair and makeup and realize there’s no way I’m going to be on time for the party since it starts at 8 PM and is thirty minutes away. Ignore incoming phone calls on house and cell phone so I can get out the door faster.

8-8:15 PM Depart house. Make it as far as driveway before association president flags me down to ask me about strange white truck parked illegally in front of my house and whether it’s okay if he tows it or not. I tell him “be my guest.”

8:15 PM Finally get on Laguna Canyon Road and get stuck behind obnoxiously slow and possibly drunk driver. Cell phone has been beeping with voice mail alerts incessantly for the last 20 minutes so I decide now is a good time to check messages since I’m not going anywhere for a while, apparently. Erase two messages from association president asking me about the white truck. Erase message from my parents telling me that association president called them because I wasn’t answering my cell phone and he was worried about me. Erase message from my parents asking if I got their earlier message and expressing that they are now concerned since I’m not answering my cell phone. Call my parents back and reassure them that I have not been hacked into little bits by an axe murderer and endure lecture about making cell phone calls from the car.

8:45 PM-12 AM Arrive at party. Drop bottle of wine on sidewalk on the way into the house – I must have a teensy drop of good karma stored up somewhere because it doesn’t break. Hope no one will notice that the wine is now severely “shaken, not stirred.” Go inside and realize that, other than the hostess, none of the people I know are there yet. Promptly drink a glass of wine and tell my inner-anorexic to get stuffed. People I know finally arrive and I quickly entrench myself with that group all night and fail to talk to anyone else. Eat two mushroom appetizers even though I’ve been told they’re full of butter and cream. Inner anorexic is now tearing out what’s left of her hair and swearing to punish my ass at the gym tomorrow. Wonder if one guy is possibly trying to flirt with me and then decide that I am either delusional or the one glass of wine has gone to my head. Decide to stay when group of people I know gets ready to leave. Get invited to do tequila shooters with group remaining behind. Take nanosecond to realize that I am not a tequila shooters kind of girl and decide to leave after all.

12-12:30 AM Drive home. Decide to take longer, but more drunk-driver-free route to get home because that’s how I roll, yo.

12:30-2 AM Get in bed but realize that I am wide awake thanks to the glass of wine (this is why I don’t drink, people, it has this weird effect on me like it’s a bucket of caffeine). Spend an hour goofing around on-line and winking at guys on match.com. Remember that it’s a flagrant violation of the internet dating “rules” book my sister-in-law sent me. Decide the book is stupid and keep sending out winks. Go back to bed and watch part of a movie. Finally fall asleep.

Sunday, August 27, 2006
8 AM Wake up. Look at clock and remind myself that this is my day to sleep in. Go back to sleep.

9 AM Wake up. Look at clock and remind myself that this is my day to sleep in. Remember all the crap I didn’t get done yesterday and get up.

9-10 AM Switch laundry loads from yesterday. Eat breakfast, feed bird and load shopping bags in car.

10-10:30 AM Realize that I had wanted to be at the mall by 10 AM so I could finish everything there and have time to come home and work on jewelry. Waste another half an hour doing something I can’t remember now before finally getting out the door.

10:30-10:50 Drive to mall. Realize upon arriving at mall that shops don’t open until 11 AM on Sundays.

10:50-11:05 AM Sit in chair outside Ann Taylor and stare into space. Have random thoughts about why this is the one day in my life that I don’t have a book in my purse to read and whether or not the guy from the party really WAS flirting with me and was I just too dense to notice and how many responses I might have in my e-mail in-box from last night’s winks. Notice it’s now 11 AM and no stores are opening. Walk up to the Ann Taylor door and glare through the glass at the slackers working inside until they finally get up off their lazy butts and open the $(#)&! door. Receive a nice “thank you” from a fellow customer who was also waiting for the store to open, but who, apparently, was too nice to do anything about it.

11:05 AM-2:30 PM Return stuff. Do additional shopping thereby negating any positive cash flow from the returns. Feel somewhat guilty, but realize that A. I do need a work wardrobe that fits so I can get out the door on time in the morning and B. It’s cheaper than (additional) therapy and less destructive to the surrounding population and infrastructure than climbing the local clock tower and is also legal (unlike running the ex over with my car and then backing up to do it again). It doesn’t have quite the same satisfying “crunch” noise, tho.

2:30-7:30 PM Arrive home and eat lunch. Contemplate working on jewelry and then remember bills need to be paid. Spend an hour organizing and paying bills. Remember legal paperwork is due. Spend half an hour looking for paperwork and another half hour filling it out. Check e-mail for responses to last night’s winks – bupkiss. Decide to go make jewelry. Pass shopping bag from “The Container Store” on the way and remember that I need to organize my makeup. Spend an hour organizing makeup only to discover that, as previously mentioned, there’s been some sort of lip gloss population explosion. Which is odd when you consider that I rarely ever wear anything on my lips other than chapstick. Spend five minutes chastising myself for wasting money on lip gloss, but vow to wear it more often now that I have it. Realize this will be easier now that I can actually FIND the lip gloss when I need it. Suddenly remember stacks of clean laundry piling up. Spend two hours putting away laundry and doing ironing. Stop when 1/3 of ironing still remains to be done because I can’t take any more. Check match.com one more time because that whole obsessive-compulsive thing really works for me. See that cute cowboy guy who I’ve been exchanging e-mails with all week has sent me an e-mail – with a quiz, no less. Decide I can’t handle the pressure of it right now and save it to deal with later.

7:30-7:45 PM Try to talk myself into skipping the gym. Fail. Change into sweats and head to the gym. Manage to remember purse, lock, magazine and water this time. Forget towel.

8-9PM Work out.

9:30 PM Arrive home, shower and realize that another weekend has gone by with no jewelry making. Start to read a book and then remember I have to get up at 4:30 the next morning. Decide to read until 10 PM anyway.

9:45 PM – Fall asleep with book on my chest.

9:50 PM Wake up, put book on bedside table and turn light out.

And there you have it – a glorious and exciting weekend in the life of KJ. I believe I’ve mentioned somewhere before in this blog that Paris Hilton SOOO wishes she was me – 41-year-old skin, extra poundage, excess lip gloss and all.

Peeves...and the women who list them.

I’ve been feeling decidedly peevish since the weekend (too many chores, not enough fun) and it occurred to me that I haven’t posted a pet peeve list in a while so it’s probably time to rectify that. It’s not good to let the peeves build up for too long. You just end up with disorganized peeves running amuck and no one likes that. So, here they are:

Peeve #1: People who don’t like or don’t understand the need for pet peeve lists.

Peeve #2: No more Al Michaels and John Madden on Monday Night Football. Yeah, I know, I can still watch it on ESPN, but come on, Joe Theismann is NO John Madden!

Peeve #3: That I can’t remember how long it’s been since the Bruins beat the Trojans in a football game.

Peeve #4: That L.A. STILL does not have a football team and probably never will.

Peeve #5: Getting Lone Ranger’d. Hey, LR, fyi…that mask is dorky and I hope you and that damn horse will be very happy together. Tanto’s cuter than you, anyway.

Peeve #6: That the Packers can’t seem to field a decent team to support Brett Favre in the latter years of his career so that he can go out like the champion he is. You’d think having a quarterback like that in place would motivate you to go out and draft at least ONE decent receiver, but no!

Peeve #7: Finding my ex’s profile on a dating site and being reminded how disgusting he is (and stupid, too, since he also put up a picture of our young child for every perv on-line to see). I swear I’m not a vindictive person (lucky for him or he’d’ve been fertilizing someone’s yard by now) but every day I get closer and closer to signing him up on dontdatehimgirl.com

Peeve #8: That going back to work has impacted my gym schedule so that I’m now plateau’d only 9 lbs. from my goal weight. ARGGHH!

Peeve #9: I discovered this weekend while organizing my bathroom (love you, Container Store!) that I have a zillion lip glosses which, although they have different color names and are from different manufacturers, are essentially the same boring shade of which Laura Mercier Lip Glace in "Blush" is a perfect example. I am possibly suffering from some kind of lip gloss-related mental deficiency.

Peeve #10: That I can’t find the exact shade of rose/copper eye shadow I’ve been searching for all summer and yet, hello! zillions of identical lip glosses.

Peeve #11: That I haven’t yet figured out what the correct response is when people ask “so, how’s (insert name of disgusting, not-quite-ex-husband here)?”

Peeve #12: I can never think of amusing, catchy titles for blog entries.

Peeve #13: Laurell K. Hamilton has ruined two perfectly good novel series with her sexual obsessions. Soooo not buying the latest Anita Blake book and didn’t buy the last Meredith Gentry book, either.

Peeve #14: That Hamilton’s editor/publisher let her get away with ruining two perfectly good series.

Peeve #15: Internet dating self-help books.

Peeve #16: Dating self-help books.

Peeve #17: Dating.

Peeve #18: That because dating is stupid, I’ve been reduced to reading self-help books (dating self-help books at that!) and therefore I am pathetic.

Peeve #18: That I went to a great party Saturday night and didn’t take advantage of the opportunity to meet new people and scope out the single guys. Instead, I turned chicken and just hung out with the crowd I already knew. Good mushroom appetizers, though.

Peeve #19: I couldn’t eat more than one of the appetizers because this insidious voice in my head kept reminding me that I wasn’t going to have time to go to the gym the next day and work off the calories. I have maybe carried the whole diet/exercise thing a little too far?

Peeve #20: I look the best I have in my entire life since I was 16 years old and no one seems to notice. Double ARRRGGHHHHH!

Peeve #21: I’m 41 years old (ouch!) and still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up.

Peeve #22: Having to grow up. I know, I should’ve thought of that before I had a kid and turned 41.

Peeve #23: That I’m the kind of person who makes and posts lists of her 23 pet peeves (oops, make that 24) on the Internet.

Peeve #24: Not having any creativity left or feeling any desire to create anything thanks to the vast pit of emotional suckage that is divorce.

Peeve #25: The pair of twits who hogged the ab bench at 24 Hour Fitness last night. Listen up, kiddies, the place is a GYM. Not a singles bar. Or a hotel. Get a room for #()@&!’s sake and get the hell out of my way. I’ve got two sets of 75 crunches to do before I finish my workout and go home and I don’t have all night. The fact that you’re just laying there flirting with each other and not doing any exercising at all is SEVERELY annoying! Besides, both of you are in perfect shape and don’t even need to be there (hence, I suppose, the no exercising and the laying around trying to look cute) so go eat a donut and leave the equipment for those of us who actually need to use it. Because we are hungry, sweaty, tired and cranky and you shouldn’t make us angry. You won’t like us when we’re angry. We might stuff that exercise ball where the sun don’t shine. Get me? Good.

It’s possible I may need a candy bar now.

KJ

Extra Credit Peeve: That my new black suede peep-toe platform wedges were perfectly comfortable in the store and for the first day that I wore them (thus making them impossible to return) but now have turned into foot torture devices of the highest order. Of course, this will not stop me from wearing them because they are so damn cute, but I will be extremely, well, peeved every time I do so.

Why the color white hates me (and a book review)

I’m finally getting back on track with the book reading so it’s time for a review and yes, I’ve got more than one book to do this time!

First up is “Oracle’s Queen” which is the third installment of Lynn Flewelling’s “Tamir” series. I’ve felt all along that this series did not live up to the promise of Flewelling’s earlier series set in the same world. It’s quite dark and a lot of tragic elements come into play and that may be what I’ve found off-putting about it. It’s too bad because the initial premise of the princess who must be hidden as a boy to save her life was handled in a very original way for such a tired old concept. There’s lots of action and the supporting cast are interesting (if not always likeable). Flewelling does tie up all the plot loose ends, but some of them get tied up a little too neatly. For example, the resolution of the main villain’s story line is awfully quick and neat. It comes off as less-than-believable. Overall, I give this whole series a grade of mediocre. There’s nothing bad about it, but it doesn’t quite fulfill its promise. Oh, and for those who find certain topics to be off-putting, Flewelling deals a lot with homosexuality and trans-gender issues as a result of the princess being hidden and then eventually revealed. If that sort of thing bothers you, then this is not the author for you.

Next up is the latest book in Kelley Armstrong’s "Women of the Otherworld” series, “Broken.” For the most part, I’ve found the books about the witches in this series to be better written and more interesting than those about the werewolves, but she did a bit better with the wolves this time. Clay isn’t quite as obnoxious as usual and Elena has made peace with a lot of her issues so things that bothered me in the earlier stories are not so prevalent. The plot, on the other hand, is awfully twisty and hard to follow. This is particularly true regarding the portal and the related mechanics of how to close it, what kind it is, who’s controlling it, etc. I also thought the whole Jack the Ripper thing had sort of been done to death. No pun intended. Also, for anyone who hasn’t tried this author before – fair warning that she’s a cross-over from the romance genre and therefore all the overly detailed sex scene issues definitely apply. Although, I didn’t think this particular book was quite as bad on that as some of the others had been. Frankly, I rather breathed a sigh of relief when Elena realizes she’s too pregnant to “carry on” any more until the babies are born. What a relief.

I guess it’s my month to follow-up on series because the last book is another of Kim Harrison’s “Rachel Morgan” series: “A Fistful of Charms.” I love this series. Rachel is feisty, powerful and yet oftentimes is her own worst enemy. And then there’s Jenks, the pixie – yum. Even better, in this book he’s grown to full human size courtesy of a not-so-white spell. I swear if anything bad ever happens to Jenks I will have to hunt the author down and ‘splain some stuff to her. Okay, no, I’ll probably just make scathing remarks about her and her ancestry here in the blog, but seriously, hands off my pixie! I have to say I’m getting tired of the whole relationship dance between Rachel and Ivy, though. The author seems to WANT them to be lesbians, but is kind of afraid to go there. While I’m grateful for that (it’s getting so overdone as to be trite and besides, I like my steamy novels hetero, please), the whole “will they or won’t they” dance is getting irritating. Either do it or don’t, but let’s all move on, please. The ending of this particular book was a little predictable, but on the other hand, I’m just happy that Rachel didn’t end up any worse off than usual. If she’d gotten herself yet ANOTHER demon mark or vamp scar, there would’ve been some seriously annoyed eye rolling going on at my house.

That’s it for this week. I’m headed to the book store on my lunch hour, though, so hopefully I’ll come back with some great stuff for future weeks.

KJ

P.S. Yes, I know that the website updates haven’t been done yet. Small problem with the logon information to the server – it was set up originally by my ex and he failed to share that info with me before he departed. So. As soon as I have about 5 hours to sit on hold with the host company’s technical support department, it’ll get fixed. For those of you who haven’t mastered the art of reading between the lines, what I’m saying here is “don’t hold your breath.”

P.P.S. Remember back when I said that I was maybe a little bit dumb for buying white pants this summer? Yeah, I need to learn to listen to my own advice. For some reason, I can wear a white skirt or white shoes with no problem. There’s something about white pants, though, that just defeats me every time. This weekend I was working on a project in my closet and using a pen to write labels on things (don’t ask) when I suddenly realized that, thanks to a stray hand gesture with the hand holding the uncapped ball point pen, I now had a streak of black ink on the white cropped pants that I was planning to wear to a party that night. Off I go to call my mother to get her to remind me how to get pen ink out of clothes (the answer, by the way, is hairspray…I don’t know why or how she figured it out, but it works). I grab my trusty neon green can of Garnier Fructis Extra Hold and spray away and then pop the pants into the wash. They’ll never be washed AND dried in time for the party so a wardrobe crisis then ensues as I try to figure out what to wear in their place. Did I learn my lesson you ask? No, of course not. I decide to wear those selfsame pants to work today and what happens? I spill Diet Coke all over my lap so now my pants are white…with caramel-color spots all over them. Oh, and I forgot to mention that when I went to grab my white purse out of the closet this morning I discovered that one entire side of it is stained with I-have-no-idea-what kind of gunk that refuses to respond to any kind of cleaning I can do that won’t damage the leather of the purse. Realize, of course, that I’ve used this purse exactly ONE time to go out to lunch and there was no sign of the gunk at the restaurant or on the chair where I carefully placed the purse (being aware, of course, that it is a WHITE purse) to keep it from getting dirty.

You know, I was initially bummed that the fall color palette is so dark, bland and boring, but now I’m thinking maybe in my case it’s a good thing?
Sigh.

More Pics

As promised, here are a few more pictures from the L.A. Gift Show:


This is a set of beautiful dichroic glass cabochons that I picked up from a new vendor. Created by fusing glass in a kiln and then cutting and polishing it to shape, glass cabs often are somewhat asymmetrical and can be a challenge to use in a design. I really loved that this vendor had such high quality pieces and had done such a good job with her cutting and polishing to get very nice shapes. The colors are phenomenal, too. The scan does not do them justice.

This next picture is a set of hand-crafted ceramic beads:


The colors are beautiful and the scan doesn't catch that the top halves of the white beads are a metallic silver (almost reflective) color. Yum. These beads came from the same vendor that sold me the beautiful Russian lacquerwork pendant I bought back in January. I made sure to get more lacquerwork this time so I don't spend the next six months lamenting that I missed out:


I wish they'd had more pansy pieces available this time because I loved the black rectangles I got in January and the earrings I made from them sold right away. They just didn't have as much selection this time in the flowers, but I got what I could. I don't think any of them are as dramatic as the previous pieces (sorry, Linnea), but they're still pretty.


Okay, that's it. Site update later this weekend if I can figure out how to FTP from home.

KJ

Site Cleanup

Just took a quick look at the website (see, I learned my lesson about checking on its status occasionally) and realized that boy, is it out of date. With things being so crazy lately, I haven't had much time to do updates and make things neat and tidy. So, apologies for that and I've put it on my "to do" list for the weekend. In the meantime, please ignore the stuff on the home page talking about "spring", etc. Obviously, that's soooo 5 minutes ago.

Oh, and since I'm apologizing, I might as well 'fess up and tell you I don't have a book to review for today. Mea culpa. I'm in the middle of two new, promising ones, though, so next week's review should be a good one.

I'll at least try to get some more of the L.A. Gift Show pictures up from home tonight. In the meantime, you'll have to be satisfied with this link to a pair of shoes that I'm currently coveting (but can totally NOT afford to buy.

I seriously cannot WAIT until my first paycheck comes in. Did I remember to mention that I got the El Pollo Loco job? Started yesterday! It totally rocks.

Free chicken for everyone!

Happy weekend and watch for the pictures later tonight.

KJ